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It’s a long story, but last week I found myself making dinner plans with a 12-year-old aspiring restaurant critic named Andrew. I can’t remember what I wanted to be when I was 12—I think it had something to do with street dancing and hosting a late-night talk show (at the same time, naturally). But I certainly didn’t have the drive of my young companion. Fresh from spending a month in Spain, where he wrote reviews of every restaurant he visited, he seemed like a particularly apropos person to accompany me to Tapas Las Ramblas.
Andrew was actually a little sick of tapas after eating so many of them in Barcelona, but he was a trouper, selecting some options from the seemingly interminable list of dishes as I bored him with the history of the restaurant. “This used to be Il Fiasco, but it’s the same owners,” I droned. Andrew couldn’t have cared less. He told me what he wanted to eat, and when our food started to arrive he asked that I give him my opinion. That, after all, was really the only thing that interested him. Then, in turn, he would give me his.
I obliged him, of course. I told him I thought the white anchovy crostini was good, the fish’s sharp notes tempered by olive oil (though the Manchego could have been better). Andrew agreed.
I told him I liked the spinach that came with the salmon—it had a strong punch of garlic, and the salmon itself was cooked to a perfect medium rare.
“But the salmon was kind of bland,” Andrew said. And when I thought about it, I decided he had a point.
Patatas bravas came out. Andrew popped one in his mouth and quickly screwed his face into a disgusted grimace. He put his hands over his mouth. “Too spicy,” he managed to say, reaching for a glass of water. I didn’t have quite the same reaction, but I did notice that the only thing the potatoes tasted like was chile pepper.
Andrew doesn’t eat shellfish or pork, so when it came to the bacon-wrapped dates and the paella de mariscos, I was on my own. The former were fine, though the bacon was a little crunchy. The latter was impressive in that the calamari, the mussels, the shrimp, the lobster—it all came out perfectly. Here again, though, the dish’s lack of spicing made it a little one-note. It was, like a lot of the food we had already eaten that night, a dish that was at once hard to fault and hard to praise.
So when our desserts—cute, miniature profiteroles and crème caramel—arrived, and I asked Andrew for his general impression of the place, I wasn’t surprised with his answer. He said he loved the service and it seemed like a good place to visit “after you’ve had a drink and need a snack.”
I’m not going to worry about how the kid knows what it’s like to need a snack after a drink. That’s not really the point. The point is, I couldn’t have said it better myself.
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Eileen
Fri, Oct 24, at 01:44pm
I was astounded that a 12 year old palate and preferences was was the centerpiece of this review. So he was in Spain is that supposed to balance out the "Andrew was a little sick of tapas" comment? Too bad David didn't have any grown-up friends who would go to dinner with him. Somehow this review seemed to be more of an essay on dinner with Andrew than a good look at Tapas las Ramblas. Thumbs down on David. As for Andrews feelings, that is David's responsibility. Make it two thumbs down.
andersunville
Sun, Oct 12, at 01:50pm
If you are interested in good tapas, go elsewhere. After an $180 dinner there was not a single "wow" all night. Bland is the best word, even with garlic and spice piled on, the food just doesn't excite. It just doesn't have the passion that any "real" spanish restaurant should have, and is probably the most disappointing tapas experience I have had in Chicago. They just don't seem comfortable making this food, it doesn't seem like a real spanish restaurant, more like Applebees does spanish.
jim
Sun, Oct 12, at 12:53pm
Maybe Las Ramblas should focus on making their food more tasty and less bland instead of spamming up all the online comments with their thinly disguised defensive comments. I've eaten here and I never thought anyone could make tapas taste bland, but they did it. Bland food, small portions and high prices... I'd say the review is pretty spot on, even maybe that this restaurant got off easy. I'm not going back. They need to take a night off and truck the whole staff to Azucar to see how its done.
Stan P.
Wed, Oct 08, at 01:15am
Tapas is much better than the last two or three places that bombed in the same spot, but it's still mediocre. I do have to give a shout out to the service (superb), but I'd be amazed if this place survives. The paella was soggy, sangria too sweet. Won't go back unless--like the young lush, Andrew-- I have too many drinks, I'm in the neighborhood, and i can't think of anyplace better. Ole!
mike
Tue, Oct 07, at 12:47pm
Well hello Davids friends and employees of TOC. Great writing skills but it seems like everyone missed the point again. We love kids at Tapas Las Ramblas, I have several. I think David should apologize to Andrew for his bad judgement. It seems TOC is embarrassed of the article or maybe the editor is a 12 year old by removing it from the Home page. Well now I must take my ball and bat and go home.
Simone
Mon, Oct 06, at 01:09pm
I have been to this restaurant, and feel that the review is spot on. Everything that I had was fine, as it was at Twist, but nothing was remarkable. The only thing that was exceptional was the service. For the people that are writing directly about young Andrew, I hope you seriously considered the fact that this 'aspiring restaurant critic' is likely reading all of your comments. If he were my child, I don't think I could begin to explain these hateful responses & ridiculous ratings.6 stars??
Ray
Sun, Oct 05, at 09:55pm
To me, the review didn't seem to rely on the kid's perspective. I agree with Jonathon, why undervalue the opinion of a twelve-year-old? Especially one who seems to know something about Spanish food. The reviewer expressed his own opinions. You may not agree with the review, but don't shoot the messenger.
jonathon
Sun, Oct 05, at 08:55pm
I thought this was an interesting, creative and accurate review.I went to Las Ramblas and, surprisingly enough, I agree with everything David Tamarken and the twelve-year-old had to say. I found the food fine --unremarkable; hard to either extol or critique. And come to think of it, it's very common to see twelve-year-olds at restaurants in Spain after 10:00 PM. I don't know why we Americans get freaked out about children. We over-coddle and under-value them at the same time. Lighten up folks
Paul
Sat, Oct 04, at 11:47am
Don't base your opinions of this restaurant on this insane review! We live in the neighborhood and have been there many times since they changed the space and we have had nothing but the best food and service experiences. This review is a disgrace and Time Out Chicago should be ashamed of themselves for publishing the reputation of a restaurant based on the opinions of a child.
Stephanie
Sat, Oct 04, at 09:55am
Wow, I am totally convinced! Thanks for sharing the opinions of a middle schooler whose dietary preferences means he can't eat half the items on the menu and whose age means he can't have any of the drinks. Good work. This is why I stick to Pollack and The Stew over at the Tribune.
Harv
Fri, Oct 03, at 09:04pm
Andrew is a well, need I say more?, and his cumpanion is just, well you know. I have never read such a critique of a restaurant before. It seems that they enjoyed an much or most of what Las Ramblas has to offer. All of their admissions of approval and then this high drama of ,well he couldn't of said it better? I think out of fairness there is some light to be shed on these two guys. Maybe they were having a spat before entering Las Rablas and found a victim to direct their frustation on.
Roberto
Fri, Oct 03, at 07:03pm
David Tamarkin makes no mention of the quality ingredients, portion size, and the cost in relationship to the value. It's just another aspect of his poorly written review. It's a shame that more critics can't raise the bar to write with the style, class, and elegance of Penny Pollack.
Robert Duran, Executive Chef,
Tapas Las Ramblas
Roberto
Fri, Oct 03, at 06:59pm
David should know better. As the Executive Chef of a kitchen, and when you make thousands of dishes a month, you must make important decisions. Should you use sauce, no sauce, marinate, don't marinate, under-season, over- season, or no season at all? When you lightly season food, it shows off the freshness and true flavors. Diners can always add more seasoning tableside. David is a professional restaurant critic and should appreciate the light touch of a kitchen. (continued above...)
Mary
Fri, Oct 03, at 06:21pm
Poor choice on using a 12 year olds opinion!
Excellent choice on going to Tapas Las Ramblas...
Caitlyn
Fri, Oct 03, at 01:24pm
This review is a joke! I'd love to hear what 12 year old Siskel and Ebert take to the R rated movies too. Maybe Andrew's parents can volunteer him! This review was in the same issue of the magazine that talks about women's "squirting" in it's sex column. Tsk Tsk TOC.
Sam
Fri, Oct 03, at 09:19am
I also feel the article is ridiculous to use the view point of a 12 year for a prospective about a bar/restaurant environment. Who teaches their 12 year old about a place that is good to go after having a drink! ? The parents of this child is who needs to be looked at (and the person brining him to the bar). The place is great and don't listen to this review. Its absurd!
Mike
Thu, Oct 02, at 05:50pm
I can’t wait to hear Andrew and David’s review of Charlie Trotter’s! Erica, I have kids and no one wants to hear anything they say, period! This article lacked all aspects of a proper review. It was worse than a Sarah Palin interview. What 12 year old says, “it seemed like a good place to visit after you’ve had a drink and need a snack”? If I could review a critic, David Tamarkin gets one star
Erica
Thu, Oct 02, at 03:57pm
I was interested in Andrew's opinions and thought their inclusion made this a better article. If you were missing the opinions of the "top restaurant reviewer," Nick, you clearly didn't read the article closely enough. Isn't there something to be said for a new perspective?
Roberto
Wed, Oct 01, at 05:03pm
I find it appalling that a food critic would trust the opinions and thoughts of a 12 year old to review someone's business. Normally, I follow the TOC reviews and appreciate not only the critiques but also the positives regarding each space reviewed. In this case, I am actually floored that a top restaurant reviewer would base his opinions and affect the business of a restaurant on the opinion of a 6th grader
