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1. Only an idiot would ink an infant, but it’s perfectly safe to dress your tough tot in this “Mom and Dad” baby onesie ($28). Available at www.sailorjerry.com. 
2. Your darling doggy will look bad to the bone in this skull collar ($38). Don’t mess with this pup, or he will “ruff” you up. Available at Barker & Meowsky, 1003 W Armitage Ave at Sheffield Ave (773-868-0200).
3.The art on your upper arms might be well hidden underneath a conservative shirt and tie, but at least your wrists can still look tough with these cuff links ($24). Available at www.pinupgirlclothing.com.
4. Pay tribute to the bad ass mutha who birthed you by slipping this hard-core hardware on to your belt. “Mother” belt buckle ($14). Available at Taboo–Tabou, 854 W Belmont Ave at Clark St (773-883-1800, ext 223).
5. Rubber ducky, you’re the one, you make bath time f#!@ing fun! Have a devilishly good time sudsing up with this ducky ($5). Available at Beyond the Wall, 935 W Belmont Ave between Sheffield and Wilton Aves (773-871-5827).
6. The colorful tableau of tattoos on this Regina Saari tote ($45) makes it as funky as it is functional. It has plenty of room to haul your essentials without sacrificing your street cred. Available at www.saaridesign.etsy.com.
7. Just when you thought Chuck Taylors couldn’t get any cooler, somebody tattooed them. Wear your irreverence on your feet with a pair of these limited-edition sneaks ($50). Available at The Alley, 3222 N Clark St at Belmont Ave (773-883-1800, ext 219).