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"I'm with Seamus. What is the point of this film? There's a good idea here that nothing is done with. Rare Export isn't scary or funny or interesting or - anything much. It just is. It seems to have started as a comic short with a touch of Monty Python about it and it's mildly, momentarily funny. It feels like a very deliberate and very unsuccessful attempt to make a film like Gremlins. It doesn’t succeed because it doesn’t tell a story. I saw it in a more or less full cinema and had the impression at the end that everyone felt they'd rather wasted their time. I think that the film lacks guts; it really needed to be crueller. Python cruel and instead it’s lily-livered – presumably thinking about the certificate. Oh! and the faux Yank needed to be much less unconvincing. Rather looked and felt like an episode of some wanky pap like Torchwood."

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