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Phone joke scoops funniest of the Fringe

Written by
Kaleigh Watterson
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A pun about mobile phones has been named the funniest joke of the Edinburgh Fringe.

Comedian Darren Walsh, whose first-ever full length show ‘Punderbolt’ is on at the Pleasance, won the accolade for his joke: ‘I just deleted all the German names off my phone. It's Hans free.'

A shortlist was compiled by a panel of ten judges who had each seen an average of 60 shows at this year’s Fringe. The list was then put to 2,000 members of the public who selected the joke they found the funniest.

It was the eighth year the award has been made with previous winners including Tim Vine, Stewart Frances and Zoe Lyons.

The top ten, as compiled by TV channel Dave, are:

1. 'I just deleted all the German names off my phone. It's Hans free.' - Darren Walsh.

2. 'Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse ... but enough about Kanye West.' - Stewart Francis.

3. 'Surely every car is a people carrier?’ - Adam Hess.

4. ‘What's the difference between a 'hippo' and a 'Zippo'? One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.' - Masai Graham.

5. ‘If I could take just one thing to a desert island I probably wouldn't go.' - Dave Green.

6. 'Jesus fed 5,000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread. That's not a miracle. That's tapas.' - Mark Nelson.

7. 'Red sky at night. Shepherd's delight. Blue sky at night. Day.' - Tom Parry.

8. 'The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper. She was wearing massive gloves.' - Alun Cochrane.

9. 'Clowns divorce. Custardy battle.' - Simon Munnery.

10. 'They're always telling me to live my dreams. But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for...' - Grace The Child.

Dave has also revealed the one-liners that just missed out on a place in the top ten:

'I never lie on my CV...because it creases it.' - Jenny Collier.

'If you don't know what introspection is you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.' - Ian Smith.

'I usually meet my girlfriend at 12:59 because I like that one-to-one time.' - Tom Ward.

'Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman. It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.' - Gyles Brandreth.

'Let me tell you a little about myself. It's a reflexive pronoun that means me.'- Ally Houston.

'Earlier this year I saw ‘The Theory of Everything’ - loved it. Should've been called ‘Look Who's Hawking’, that's my only criticism.' - James Acaster.

See more from the Edinburgh festivals from Time Out.

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