Christmas

Turkey panic

So, you’re in a flap because you haven’t got a turkey? Don’t panic: here are your options. Start by selecting a good local butcher and get on the phone to check for stock.

Allens of Mayfair (7499 5831) assures us it always has a few turkeys left over on Christmas Eve with prices starting at a very reasonable £9.95 for the traditional bronze turkey – although it’s advisable to try to get your bird as soon as you can to ensure you get the size you want.

Frank Godfrey in Highbury (7561 1713) is recommending customers place orders by December 20 at the very latest. If all the turkeys have sold out, try a goose or rolled turkey breast.

In East Dulwich, William Rose (126 Lordship Lane, SE22 8HD; 8693 9191) may have a few turkeys left on Christmas Eve but suggests getting down there as soon as you can to secure a bird.

If you are really desperate you could brave the supermarket queues and head to Sainsbury’s (0800 636 262), Tesco or Waitrose. All will have fresh turkeys arriving in store on December 20. In fact, real scrimpers can pick up a frozen goose for just £9.99, Lidl stores across London, up to Christmas Day. Feature continues

If you’re a rubbish wrapper or simply don’t have time the best thing to do is to get things packaged as you buy them. Liberty, Selfridges and Harvey Nichols will wrap most small items at point of purchase, John Lewis offers expert wrapping on the fifth floor (from £3.75 for a smallish gift), Harrod’s Wrapology concession on the lower ground floor will wrap anything of any quantity. Pick from around 1,500 different paper styles, from Japanese Yuzen papers to Woodblock prints from the 1950s to Paddington and Dr Seuss prints, from £5.75 for a small gift.

Fortnum & Mason will wrap any item that costs more than £20 for free, or charge a reasonable £2.50 for cheaper items (and will text you when they’re done).

Last-minute gifts

With a few easy clicks of your mouse you can buy a dream beauty treatment or theatre ticket – perhaps you can even download it from your computer and print it out on Christmas morning. Most people will appreciate a voucher for a divine beauty treatment.

We highly recommend any body or face treatment at Elemis, the intense and amazing Thai Yoga Massage at The Sanderson or a Dermalogica Prescription Facial at men’s grooming salon The Refinery.

If you are searching for a super-girly gift, ring Austique on the King’s Road (7376 4555) and ask them to put together one of its special made-to-order Christmas stockings, starting at £100. Last order December 23.

Other options that can be purchased online immediately include Rough Trade’s excellent Album Club where the store’s cherry-picked indie hits are sent to your door once a month. Membership is available in three-, six- or 12-month durations in CD or MP3 formats (prices start at £24 for three months MP3 membership, and £36 for three months CD membership) and this year’s highlights included TV On The Radio, Arcade Fire and Antony & The Johnsons.

Bloomsbury’s one-stop philosophy shop, the School of Life offers a Bibliotherapy service for lapsed book-lovers. Bibliotherapists will meet you at The School of Life (or via phone or email) for an initial half-hour consultation about your attitude and experiences of books and secret interests, and you will leave with a beautifully presented reading prescription, with a longer list emailed to you within days.

Organic food fans who are sick of carrots and curly kale might appreciate an organic meat box from Well Hung Meat, packed with prime beef steaks, handmade sausages, chops, mince and other speciality cuts from £47 per delivery, while theatre fans should be thrilled with See Tickets vouchers.

Games
A good way to avoid family feuds on Christmas Day is distraction in the form of a good old-fashioned board game. If you’re tired of Trivial Pursuit or Scrabble, try Hollywood Domino (£28.99, www.amazon.co.uk), an addictive new game (until recently a secret among Hollywood’s A-list) which enables you to make your own movie by laying your tiles right. Perudo (£15, www.hamleys.com) is a thrilling dice game of guesswork and bluff. Alternatively, there’s the nostalgic-looking Touring England board game (reprinted from the 1930s), which is perfect for dads who love to plan the perfect route (£7.75, www.johnlewisonline.com). Avoid the Hanger Lane gyratory at all costs.

Christmas Day alone
You’re on your lonesome on the one day synonymous with fellowship: what are you going to do? Well, there’s the old ‘go out on a Christmas Eve bender then sleep it off on the 25th’ trick which is usually followed by a vigorous bout of TV and DVD consumption. Doesn’t appeal? Then go to work, if you’re (un)lucky enough to work in a profession that doesn’t give a stuff about public holidays, and get some of that double-time money. If you are alone through some unhappy circumstance, why not volunteer? Shelter, Crisis and the Salvation Army offer well-established opportunities to volunteer at Christmas but they usually start recruiting early so if you haven’t already signed up, check out Timebank or do-it for volunteering opportunities in your area. And if you’re an international student Host UK match lone students with local families keen to share the love over Christmas.

Transport

On Christmas Eve, TfL will run a Saturday service on the tube until 7pm, then a reduced service with last trains at Sunday times. Buses will also run to a Saturday service ending about midnight, and the last London Overground services will depart at about 9pm.

There are no TfL services on Christmas Day, but they resume on Boxing Day with a reduced Sunday timetable. Monday 29 and Tuesday 30 have a Saturday service, which is reduced on New Year’s Eve with trains and buses running throughout the night.

There will be free travel on New Year’s Eve from 11.45pm until 4.30am on the Tube, DLR, London buses, London Overground, Tramlink and selected National Rail services out of London after midnight. From Christmas Day until New Year’s Day inclusive, you don’t have to pay the Congestion Charge.

To book a black cab, ring the 24-hour Taxi One-Number (0871 871 8710) or hail one in the street. There’s an extra £4 charge on Christmas Day per fare. To find a licensed minicab, ring the 24-hour information line (7222 1234) or use the Cabwise service: text the word HOME to 60835 and you’ll be sent telephone numbers for two licensed minicab operators in the area, along with a taxi operator.

Try one of the capital’s eco-friendly minicab firms which use hybrid petrol and electric-powered Toyota Prius cars, and offset carbon emissions. With Climatecars (8968 0440), newspapers, magazines and Belu mineral water come as standard, while bike racks allow cyclists who’ve had a tipple or got caught out by the rain to hitch a ride home; Ecoigo (0800 032 6446) offers a 24-hour service and carbon emissions are offset by the World Land Trust; and Green Tomato Cars’ (8568 0022) fleet of sleek silver Priuses operates across town, offering competitive prices and a reliable service.

Religious services
Seeing as it’s His birthday, why not show JC some love? The Actors' Church in Covent Garden has a Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve (followed by a free glass of wine) and 11am Mass on Christmas Day. Southwark Cathedral has Eucharist with carols at 9am followed by choral Eucharist at 11am, Westminster Cathedral has four Roman Catholic services including mass with carols at 12noon, and if you fancy something a little livelier check out Ruach Ministries in Brixton Hill, famed for its five Sunday services, in-church cash point and fantastic gospel choir.

Health emergencies

NHS Direct
A one-stop-shop for free health advice and should be your first port of call if you’re feeling unwell, or need to find your nearest doctor, A&E, minor injuries unit, pharmacist, dentist or support group.
0845 4647/www.nhsdirect.nhs.uk

Eye clinics
London has two 24-hour emergency departments dealing specifically with eye injuries, although if your injuries are more extensive you should go to a regular A&E department.

Moorfields Eye Hospital also has a nurse-led telephone helpline on 7566 2345, open 8.30am-4.30pm Monday to Friday.
162 City Rd, EC1V 2PD (7253 3411/www.moorfields.nhs.uk).

Western Eye Hospital is open 24 hours a day for ambulance and walk-in cases.
171 Marylebone Rd, NW1 5PN (7886 6666/www.imperial.nhs.uk).

Dentists
If you need an emergency dentist, ring your own dentist first. Even out of hours, they should have emergency information on their answerphone. If you don’t have a dentist, ring NHS Direct or Guy’s Hospital’s Dental Emergency Care Service on 7188 0512. Guy’s also provides free walk-in emergency treatment (Guy’s Hospital, St Thomas Street, SE1 9RT; 7188 0511); it’s open 9am-5pm Monday to Friday, but queues start forming at 8am. Arrive by 10am if you’re to be seen at all.

NHS Walk-in Centres
NHS Walk-in Centres offer confidential advice and treatment for minor injuries and illnesses. Staffed by experienced nurses, they’re often open seven days a week (hours vary) and many (but not all) are open over the Christmas period. Find your nearest through the NHS Direct site at www.nhs.uk.

Charing Cross NHS Walk-In Centre, Charing Cross Hospital, Fulham Palace Rd, W6 8RF (8846 1234). 8am-10pm Mon-Fri; 9am-10pm Sun. Christmas Day, Boxing Day and New Year’s Day with weekday opening hours.

Hackney NHS Walk-In Centre, Homerton University Hospital, Homerton Row, E9 6SR (8510 5342). 8am-10pm Mon-Fri; 9am-10pm Sat, Sun. Christmas Day, Boxing Day and New Year’s Day with weekday opening hours.

Tooting NHS Walk-In Centre, Clare House, St Georges Hospital, Blackshaw Rd, SW17 0QT (8700 0505). 7am-10pm seven days including Boxing Day and New Year’s Day. 8am-8pm Christmas day.

Whitechapel NHS Walk-In Centre, Whitechapel Hospital, 174 Whitechapel Rd, E1 1BZ (7943 1333). 7am-10pm Mon-Fri; 9am-10pm Sat, Sun. Christmas Day, Boxing Day and New Year’s Day with weekday opening hours.

Late-night chemistsZafash Pharmacy, 233-235 Old Brompton Rd, SW5 0EA (7373 2798). 24 hours daily.

Bliss Chemists, 5-6 Marble Arch, W1H 7EL (7723 6116). Daily 9am-midnight.

Pet-sitting services
No neighbours around to feed Fluffy when you vacate the capital to see your folks? Call in one of London’s trusted pet-sitting services. North London-based P4Pets (7700 2521) offers a number of pet services such as dog-walking, pet-sitting and boarding. Cat visiting, which includes feeding, grooming and litter change, costs £12 per weekday visit (up to one hour) and £15 for a weekend visit. They will do their best to accommodate requests at short notice.

Based in south-west London, Pet Nanny (8875 0341) provides pet carers who will feed, exercise and love your pets. Cat-sitting from £10 per day. Busy People (8981 8972) offers a range of services at both hourly and fixed-fee rates. Waiting in for a delivery, for example, is charged at £40 for four hours (excl VAT), cat-sitting at £9.50 per visit and moving house cleans at £12 per hour, while party help can be hired for £14 per hour, or a weekend nanny for £10 per hour. References are scrupulously checked.

If your pet goes missing over Christmas, contact local police stations, vets and animal rescue centres; to find your local police station, visit www.met.police.uk. The RSPCA also recommends ringing its cruelty and advice line (0300 123 4999) open 24 hours a day, seven days a week. You should also call the animal warden at your local council (normally within the environmental health division), who has responsibility for registering strays. The Missing Pets Bureau (0870 199 9999) operates a national missing pets register and has links to more than 12,000 rescue centres and other organisations. You should also make your own posters and put them up in your local area.

Vets and animal hospitals

Blue Cross Animal HospitalThe Blue Cross Animal Hospital has an emergency line that’s open 24 hours a day, seven days a week, including over Christmas. It also provides pet ambulances.
Sheppard House, 1-5 Hugh St, SW1V 1QQ (7932 2370/www.bluecross. org.uk).

Beaumont Animals’ Hospital
Although closed on Christmas Day, Boxing Day and New Year’s Eve, an emergency number will be provided.
The Royal Veterinary College, Royal College St, NW1 0TU (7387 8134/www.rvc.ac.uk).

Emergency Veterinary ClinicThis deals with out-of-hours emergencies and is open over the Christmas period.
55 Elizabeth St, SW1W 9PP (7730 9102).

Home emergencies

National Grid
The National Grid (formerly Transco) operates a free, 24/7 emergency service. If you smell gas, ring the helpline – though if you’re calling from a mobile, go outside first.
0800 111999/www.transco.uk.com

Council for Registered Gas Installers
All contractors should be registered with Corgi by law; call to check if you’re in doubt, or to find a Corgi-registered installer. The website also provides advice on gas safety.
0800 915 0480/www.trustcorgi.com

Thames Water
Ring to report water leaks.
0800 714614/www.thames-water.com

Electrical Contractors’ Association
This nationwide trade association can provide you with a list of contractors.
7313 4800/www.eca.co.uk

National Inspection Council for Electrical Installation Contracting
The NICEIC is a regulatory body issuing strict rules to its members; use the online Find an Electrician feature to locate your nearest registered electrician.
0870 013 0382/www.niceic.org.uk

Absolute Glass
Undertakes emergency window repair, and installs all types of glass and windows. Open 24hrs.
7394 9324/24hr emergency line 0800 298 1488/www.absoluteglass.net

The Master Locksmiths Association
Will help you find a qualified locksmith on call over the Christmas period in your area.
0800 783 1498/www.locksmiths.co.uk

Aqua-Care
This CORGI-registered emergency specialist offers a one-hour service with no call-out fee.
0800 389 2238/ www.24hrlondonplumber.co.uk

Leakbusters
Plumbers whose work comes in under the original quote due to unexpected savings are hard to find: this is a north London gem.
0800 328 8125/www.leakbusters.net

Tree disposal
Once the festive season is over it’s time to dispose of your tree. Many councils throughout London provide a Christmas tree recycling service and will even pick it up from your home. Call Recycle for London to get the number for your council’s recycling service (0845 3313). Alternatively, it’s possible to compost your tree but that means shredding it yourself and pine needles take a while to break down. For further essential services throughout the capital, see Time Out’s ‘The Little Black Book of London’, £6.39 from our shop.
www.recycleforlondon.com

And if you hate Christmas…
It may seem like an impossible task when the sound of Paul McCartney and Slade permeates your headspace like tinnitus but opting out of Christmas is an option. Most Yulephobes either choose to stay at home, alone (see above), or consider Christmas period an opportune moment to abscond from Judeo-Christian civilisation by spending a fortnight in Thailand. But if you are here and fancy leaving your house check out The Peter Pan Cup , an annual charity swimming race held from 9am at the Serpentine. Ripley’s Believe it or Not museum of the weird and wonderful is open from 10am to 12midnight 365 days of the year, while London Walks have two walks at 11am and 2pm on Christmas Day. Evans Evans and Golden Tours offer river cruises with lunch. And most excitingly for Yulephobes, Queen’s Ice Bowl in Bayswater is open from 12pm-8pm on Christmas Day offering ten-pin bowling, indoor ice-skating and karaoke.