Hooray for pirates! A free party for everyone dressed as dastardly thieves of the sea. Prizes for best pirate costume (says the promoter: 'think good pirates, hairy pirates or, better yet, sexy pirates'), advanced pirating classes – pronunciation, pirating history… – plus sea shanties to be sung and dubloons to be found.

Difficult to say. and not sure why meeting me would be better than you meeting the girl above or below my ad. I guess being fairly new in London, I...