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  • By Malcolm Hay. Photography Rob Greig

  • Feature_newlondoncomics4.JPG
    Even by MI5 standards, this was a shoddily disguised bugging devise

    Andrew Lawrence
    Sell your act in a line... 'I leave all the necessities of promotion in the hands of my management'

    Age 26.

    Manor Croydon.

    Who is he? In a rasping, croaky voice he tells tales of his miserable upbringing in a dysfunctional family and his own shocking patterns of behaviour. Abandoned by his parents, he was brought up by squirrels and became a feral child. He once put his mother in a particularly tasty lasagne. It’s just one among many stories of extreme violence. Audiences detest or adore him. Feature continues

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    Lawrence went to university in Scotland, worked in a library for a year and moved to London after he came second in the So You Think You’re Funny? competition in 2003. He used to get nervous when he went on stage: ‘I don’t now. It wasn’t helpful.’ At the Edinburgh Festival he was shortlisted for the if.comeddie Best Newcomer Award. He views the prospect of fame with mixed feelings. ‘The more successful I become, the earlier I might have to get up. If I achieve a level of success where I have to get up before 9.30am, the only solution will be to rest on my laurels.’

    Worst gig A ‘Spank!’ show at the Edinburgh Fringe last year. ‘Heckled by a drunk man. Invited him on stage for a fight. Had a fight on stage. Lost. Rescued by bouncers. Tried to finish my act. Booed by the audience. Went home, had a cry.’

    Favourite comedians No comment.

    Favourite London clubs The Red Rose Comedy Club: ‘It has a dilapidated charm. On a night when it’s not full, the indifference of the audience is deafening, but when it’s packed the audience can be sweetly reverential and it can be magic.’

    Look out for Comedy Store gigs (October 19-21) on his return from a festival in South Africa.

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11 comments

  1. Posted by Paul T on 26 Nov 2011 10:20

    Is Josie Long a comedian? Really? Why isn't she funny then?

  2. Posted by John Coan on 19 Aug 2011 21:19

    She is about as funny as a burning orphanage

  3. Posted by melina on 06 Aug 2011 23:56

    I've tried very hard to like this lass, but she's not funny AT ALL. Sorry.

  4. Posted by not funny on 31 Jul 2009 18:24

    SHE NOT FUNNY AT ALL. wtf is wrong with people?

  5. Posted by kim on 02 Jul 2009 22:34

    hi there,you made me laugh,im intrested in holding a comedy night an would like you to be apart of it. if you can contact me on,07940 975897,or my email above. thans.kim

  6. Posted by THE ELECTRIC HEAD on 27 Feb 2007 16:29

    This is the voice of The Electric Head - I am telepathically beaming these words directly into your brain, I'm sorry about that, but I have no choice. Go to www.myspace.com/theelectrichead and follow the links to itunes for more information...a new age of comedy is dawning...

  7. Posted by Joey "IRON MAN" Whittle on 27 Feb 2007 12:47

    She's well funny. She made me actually want to go out and buy a load of chickpeas and eat them. I don't even like chick peas. She didn't even talk about them in her act. I didn't even see her act.
    Bloody terrifying, actually, when I come to think about it. But she is well funny. If a bit freakily higher power psychic with the chick pea thing.

  8. Posted by Real comedy fan on 04 Feb 2007 20:25

    All this is well and good...but...Josie Long is simply not REMOTELY funny.

  9. Posted by Steven Stones on 27 Nov 2006 17:52

    I have since seen Sarah and she is now a member. You to can be one by typing The Stuffed Owl Consortium into a search engine of your choice. Its great fun.

  10. Posted by pad on 02 Oct 2006 16:02

    i saw josie long last night at and she is a sweet sweet slice of sunshine. i think i'm a bit in love with her

  11. Posted by Steven Stones on 28 Sep 2006 10:04

    Bloody Hells Bells. I used to work with Sarah Millican. And now she's getting in Time out. Thats great that. If you see her tell her she can join my new club what I've started up. Its called The Stuffed Owl Consortium.

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