Kids

Thanks to fatherhood, it’s a long time since I went out clubbing, but I’m sure it never used to be like this. I’m outside the Clapham Grand on St John’s Hill on a Saturday afternoon and the line of punters waiting to be given the nod by the doormen snakes down the stairs and around the corner – but this queue consists overwhelmingly of small children and parents pushing baby buggies. Welcome to Baby Loves Disco, the club event for kids – and their dance-starved parents.

Founded by Heather Murphy in Philadelphia three years ago as ‘something different to do with our kids’, Baby Loves Disco spread to 22 US cities before hitting London at the end of last year. The monthly sessions at the Clapham Grand are massively popular – the next four events are already sold out and UK organiser Naomi Timperley is now hoping to find a north London venue to also hold monthly events. Timperley, who has two daughters, read about Baby Loves Disco on the net. ‘I’d never done anything like this, but thought we should do something,’ she says.
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At home, my 17-month-old daughter, Leila, will dance to anything – the Jesus And Mary Chain, ‘The Bear Necessities’, the bongs before ‘The Six O’Clock News’ – but when confronted by the disco beats and heaving dance floor of the Grand she makes a beeline for the chill-out area provided for younger children and exhausted parents, settling down on a cushion with a good book.

Bathed in disco lights on the dance floor below, kids from seven years to six months throw shapes to the Bee Gees, Madonna and Michael Jackson – the younger ones bopping away in their parents’ arms. A DJ interrupts his set to proffer gold medallions to star dancers before holding a game of musical statues into which the kids launch themselves with that endearing mix of concentration and crapness. There’s also face-painting, healthy snacks, balloons and hula hoops for kids and, crucially, a bar for adults.

Unfortunately, Leila declines to take part in any of this – as soon as I take her down to the dance floor she makes a break for the exit. It usually takes at least half an hour for young children to get used to the noise, I’m told, but after that they’re begging for more. As we head blinking into the Saturday afternoon sunlight, the disco beats pound behind us and the kids continue to boogie. ‘See you same place next month,’ says the woman at the door and Leila’s wave might just be an affirmative.

For more information, see www.babylovesdisco.co.uk.