We tried. Honestly, we gave it a good three or four listens from start to finish, just searching for something, anything positive to say about the easiest target in showbusiness (or, for that matter, any business). Is there any point, we thought, in making yet more gags about how James Blunt is posh/is a wet blanket/has a name that so handily rhymes with the word that best sums up sentient Britain’s opinion of him? Will it really put even the tiniest of dents in the inevitable nine zillion album sales?
It is with this in mind that, rather than wasting space on such things, or describing the actual music here (insipid, beige, devoid of… oh, come on, you know), we now present some of the lyrical howlers that more effectively demonstrate his Satanic levels of hideousness. ‘Why don’t you give me some love/I’ve taken a shitload of drugs!’ he rasps on ‘Give Me Some Love’; ‘But the walls come tumbling down/Will you go down on me?’ some poor sap by the name of ‘Annie’ is asked; ‘Is a poor man rich in solitude, or will Mother Earth complain?,’ he ponders on
‘I Really Want You’. For the best one of all, though, we must return to ‘Give Me Some Love’: ‘Me and my guitar play my way… and it makes them frown.’ Frankly, James, that is the understatement of the fucking century.
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13 comments
Hamish, genius review,had me in stitches... so true, so true...
I've heard this 'Hamish' character is a bit of a kung fu psycho. He studied under Bodhidharma Sardili in china. I'd watch what comments your putting on here to be honest. Seriously, do not mess...
Hamish, if you honestly can't find anything nice to say about this amazing album, then your emotions are seriously out of whack. This album rocks for so many reasons. After reading your review i can tell that you havn't understood a single lyric from James Blunt and that is such a pity because you could gain so much from the songs if you just opened up your heart and your mind a little and looked a bit deeper.
This talented musician gets so much hateful bullsh!t written about him in reviews in tabloids and you can guarantee that if you mention the name "James Blunt" insults will follow.
Going by his album sales alone tells you there are a lot of secret Blunt fan out there.
James is a brilliant singer and songwriter, get over it and stop hiding in the closet Hamish.
Well Amos, you are kind. I think Hamish can't write and is unable to be a fair critic.
At least there are more than 11 million people that would like to have a good talk with this Hamish crappish !
Well, Hamish MacBain I love this album. Whilst I recognise divergent musical tastes, what is the vitriolic abuse hurled at James Blunt from every corner of the media all about? This wasn't a music review, but sheer bile.
Hamish, you need to see an ear specialist, they're too full of the garbage that tries to pass of as music these days, the stuff that needs videos and sex to sell. James Blunt's music reaches the hearts and minds of all ages around the world. Even if you don't like his music, which you are entitled to, you should at least show some respect. You've insulted a musician and his fans.
"All The Lost Souls" is an album of recognizable talent - for those looking for more than a quick fix.
It will be recognized in hindsight as one of the best albums of our time.
Why? Because the singer and songwriter connects with the listener, as few "here today" bands do.
Shame, when I used to live in London "Time Out" used to have top reporters, reviewers, journalists with finess, their eloquant fingers on the pulse of good music.
You seem to have missed the boat on this one, Hamish.
Well I think Hamish should go find a little man in a boat and sail off into the sunset with him and leave us intellectuals to enjoy and understand James's music in peace
Hamish you are obviously a deaf twat, all the lost souls is without doubt the best album in the world ever. Though I suppose someone like you with a tiny willy always has to have a pop at someone as wonderful as james Blunt just because he gets a damn sight more fanny than you do you sad sap.
Hamish. spot on mate. jeez how has this man sold so many albums? it's a damning verdict on a nation's music tastes!
haha, that review is genius.
if only james blunt was as creative as mr macbain
Hamish has his own problems, poor guy. He can write, but not about music. I suspect chippiness is his problem.