Kulu Kulu

Following my last visit I have sighed, tightened my coat against the wind, and vowed not to return here. This, along with it's twin in Shelton St, used to be a hidden highlight of London eating-- nip in, grab a seat, pick some sushi-- a little if you just fancied a snack, more if you couldn't resist the temptation, with the only worry being your own gluttony. The quality was never amazing, but the cheap prices tended to soothe any ruffled culinary feathers.
Alas, over the last year I have watched it steadily decline in the following ways:
- -Sushi quality has fallen. Nigiri that looks as if it's been rolled by a child, falling apart if disturbed in any way. Cuts of fish that recall the Simpson's line " IT LOOKS AS IF IT'S BEEN HACKED TO DEATH BY A BLIND WOODSMAN"
- - Hot food, be it kara-age chicken, gyoza dumplings, rarely appears on the belt and if ordered specially, takes a short eternity to arrive-- some "reminding" is necessary if you want your grandchildren to see it. Gyoza, if available, is usually good, although kara-age chicken looks like a bubble-fried KFC reject
- - Prices have risen recently, sneaked in for January (same as the train companies do), but this wouldn't be quite as bad if Kulu hadn't changed up on their pricing scheme-- dishes that used to be cheap now fall in higher tariffs, even though they haven't changed!! Only squid is cheap now, and NO-ONE eats squid!!
-- Clearly trying to coerce customers into spending more, they now employ a tactic of only putting high-end dishes onto the belt, hoping that gradual hunger or social awkwardness will make you spend more than you wanted and eat what you didn't necessarily want (it used to be a more reasonable selection). It's a disappointingly cynical and obvious ploy.
--Service is usually friendly, for the three seconds it exists; prepare to be quietly annoyed by the lack of staff available to take orders for hot food, drinks etc. I have seen others comment on the non-Japaneseness of the staff, for me this is not a problem in the least; as long as they can roll a decent maki, I'd be happy to be served by a chimp.
-- There's no 'optimum' time for turning up: peak times will see the seating around the belt quickly filled up, with those 'downstream' never seeing a morsel arrive (bar the unidentifiable), while arriving at quieter times will see no food on offer-- I once turned up at 6pm exactly, only to be told that although there were five of us in there, there were not enough to justify making any food(!)
So all in all, a once cheeky and delightful little experience has morphed, over a year or two, into a dragged-out period of disappointment bordering on insult.
Kulu Kulu, where are you?