Lies to tell tourists

Londoners tweeted some great #londonliesfortourists – here are some of our favourites

Each week the 'Lies to tell tourists' slot in Time Out magazine invents new cruel and unjust ways to bamboozle visitors to London. We also created the #londonliesfortourists for our Twitter followers to dream up their own cheeky misdirections. We've compiled a list of our 20 of our favourite tweeted whoppers for your amusement below - but can you do better? Tweet us at @timeoutlondon or post your lies in the comments box.

© Abigail Lelliott

Hyde Park only has one corner, making it a mathematical phenomenon. (@TomGoodliffe)

When the organ starts in St Pauls Cathedral, the first couple on the dance floor win a prize(@davidconstable)

Elephant and Castle is a wonderful place with a safari park and an enchanted castle. (@mancunian)

Just take the stairs Just take the stairs

Pay for your tube journey by pushing your credit card into the slot at the ticket barrier. (@robmanuel)

Take the steps rather than the lift at Covent Garden Underground station - there aren't many and it's much quicker. (@OldBoyBaz)

When on the tube its customary to introduce yourself to the people sitting next to and opposite you. (@magiczebras)

If you're looking for love, you'll find many eligible, single ladies in King's Cross. (@TashyMcTashason)

When on a bus, it is customary to sing along to the music being played to you from the mobile phones of teenagers. (@johnbaldy)

Visit Hogwarts by running through the barrier between platforms nine and ten at Kings Cross station. (@mufcfans)

Renowned fridge seller, Selfridges Renowned fridge seller, Selfridges

The Queen does all announcements on the underground. (@bravenewmalden)

Barclays Bank will pay a £100 reward if you return any of the many bikes they have lost to one of their branches. (@politic_animal)

Red telephone boxes may be used as urinals in an emergency. (@CathyMcTavey)

Staff at Selfridges love being asked if they sell fridges. (@andylewisuk)

Can you hear the sea? Can you hear the sea?

Don't forget to go celebrity spotting in Wetherspoons. (@julianswainson)

You may hear youngsters talk about their affiliation to "ASBO". This stands for Altruistic Saintly Behaviour Order. (@mrglover glover)

The 2012 Olympics are in London, Texas, USA, not London, UK, don't you know? (@theidiotstamp)

If you put an Oyster card against your ear, you can hear the sea. (@TomGoodliffe)

Tranquil Oxford Street Tranquil Oxford Street - © Abigail Lelliott

Tourists are encouraged to identify themselves by going to Soho and telling people they are 'looking for a good time'. (@rivercassade)

Everyone in London loves it when you walk slowly. Oh, and randomly stop to take photos. (@mikeblakeney)

Escape the hustle and bustle of the city and go for a wander down the famously tranquil Oxford Street. (@Samincornwall)


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  • If you want to board the tube you have to put your arm out and flag it down like you would a taxi.

    @citylad09 Mon Aug 6 2012
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  • Red bus drivers offer a discount when you pay your fare with a £50 note.

    Mel Sat Aug 4 2012
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  • Really? These are the best you guys can do? When I lived in Alaska, the humdingers people would tell to tourists there could get the visitors killed. On the other hand, the bears ate rather well...

    Eric Sat Aug 4 2012
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  • People find it amusing if you push in the queue at Sainsbury's in South London

    Jocelyn Sat Aug 4 2012
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  • On the elevators in the Underground stations, always stand on the left and don't move.

    Mireille Mon Feb 6 2012
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  • People will be really grateful if, should they leave their Metro behind, you run after them & return it to them.

    meg Fri Feb 3 2012
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  • Happy slapping is a tradition in Soho on weekends.

    Ian Mon Jan 30 2012
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  • Used to work at the Chesire Cheese on Fleet Street and the mangager told an American tourist that the dragon that marks the boundary of the City was Queen Victoria's pet dragon, and when it died she had a statue erected in its memory. The bloke believed him, and that is a true story.

    jm Wed Jan 18 2012
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  • why so negative? as if London wasn't negative enough...

    sam Fri Dec 9 2011
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  • friendly=londoners

    lagartija Sat Dec 3 2011
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