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    Capitol improvements

    Tue Jan 20

    It's early, I know. Barack was just sworn in and already I'm thinking ahead. How cool would it be if Malia and Sasha followed in daddy's footsteps? The Obama Political Dynasty can carry us for a few generations as far as I'm concerned. Granted, we need someone in between Barack and his daughters. Someone who's around 27 now. I'll get on that immediately. But before I do, I have a small request: Dear Mr. New President, Can you take a look at the law that requires all prospective Presidents to have been born in the U.S.? I know you had a little speed bump with that law yourself during your campaign. Wouldn't it be great if it were a non-issue? My daughter, a wonderful specimen of calm and intelligence, would be a marvelous President. However, since she was born in Russia (I adopted her at 19 months), she's ineligible. How about tweaking that rule a little bit? A few years ago, California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger tried to change it and failed. I get that the idea behind the...

    Little Adolf Hitler removed from home

    Tue Jan 20

    There are a lot of folks out there who love bizarre baby names (Jason Lee's son Pilot Inspektor, anyone?), but when does creative freedom become child abuse? Three tots with neo-Nazi names were first introduced to the nation back in December when a supermarket bakery refused to write the eldest child's moniker, Adolf Hitler, on his birthday cake. The saga spawned a sequel last week when Adolf and his little sisters, JoyceLynn Aryan Nation and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie (no, we're not kidding), were removed from their parents' home by the New Jersey Division of Youth and Family Services. The reason for their removal is unknown. But let's face it: The authorities got involved because of their names. If the parents didn't actually do anything abusive to their kids (beyond the obvious), do you think the government has the right to take them away?

    Recycling: This will make you flip your lid!

    Fri Jan 16

    I dined with my friend Michael last night and he clued me into an important nugget of info I didn't know: Bottles with caps left on will NOT be recycled. Crazy, right? Michael had recently been to the Trash Museum in Hartford, CT. On the tour, visitors watch as a bunch of bottles is separated into two piles, one that will be recycled, and one that won't simply because the caps were left on. The result is thousands and thousands of bottles that end up in landfill instead of being made into new products. The reasons are logistical and complex, but it basically boils down to the fact that the cap is made from a different type of plastic that has a higher melting point. Recycling guidelines vary by location, but you can read up on NYC's rules here . Thankfully this is an easy mistake to rectify: Simply get your little ones (and everyone you know, for that matter) to get in the habit of removing caps, corks and any other type of lid before tossing the bottles...

    Snow job

    Thu Jan 15

    I am not a fan of snow. My daughter, on the other hand, would live in an igloo, if the choice presented itself. If you're like me but you don't want to deprive your child of the fluffy stuff, here are some suggestions. You've got to learn to love it! 1. Get a very, very warm coat. None of my fashionable outerwear was ever really warm enough for spending any extended period of time outdoors, so I went to the Salvation Army store on 23rd Street and bought the warmest (which also happened to be the ugliest) thing I could find. It's a combo electric blue and red long parka, filled with down, made in Austria, and it cost me $10. We refer to this monstrosity as my snow coat and my daughter knows that when I put it on, it's playtime! While you're there, invest in a pair of waterproof gloves for a couple of bucks. 2. Snow-writing. When my daughter was first learning to write, I would write a single letter on a snow-covered car and my daughter add another letter. If your child is writing...

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    Every summer (this year marks the 26th anniversary...

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