Light green
(i.e., doing the bare minimum)

Illustration: Wendy Plovmand

So you wanna be green but can’t commit to cloth toilet paper? Here’s how to do the absolute minimum and still make Sting proud.

What to do: Recycle, duh

What you get out of it: The chance to save a little face when everyone’s talking about the environment, since “Recycling is bullshit” doesn’t go over too well these days at parties.  And if you just can’t bear to separate paper and plastics, consider alternative waste-defying solutions: Switch to online bill paying, buy songs from iTunes or call J. Crew and ask them to stop sending you catalogs—less clutter for you.

What the environment gets out of it: Not as much gas. Thank landfills for 36 percent of all global-warming-causing methane emissions in the U.S. For a roundup of recycling events, see Around Town.

What to do: Conserve water

What you get out of it:  The chance to save the world, just by turning a knob while brushing your teeth during Conan. A running faucet can use two to three gallons per minute.

What the environment gets out of it: Fifty to seventy-five percent of all residential water use happens in the bathroom. Use less water when you take a shower by nabbing a water-conserving showerhead like the one by Oxygenics (available in the city at Bed Bath & Beyond, various locations, for $35–$60). The heads increase oxygen content in the water and self-pressurize (there’s a massage feature, too!). Low-flow showerheads use only 2.5 gallons of water per minute, compared with the standard showerhead’s 4–7 gallons.

What to do: Conserve electricity

What you get out of it: If the thought of going through your home replacing all your incandescent lightbulbs with compact fluorescents exhausts you (even though they are available everywhere these days, even area Gristedes), don’t worry. “One of the laziest and easiest things you can do is make a five-minute call to Con Edison or look up ConEdSolutions.com to switch your apartment’s electric load to wind power,” Jervey says. “It doesn’t affect your lifestyle, and it’s less than a 10 percent premium on your bill.”

What the environment gets out of it: Power from wind means no evil air emissions. ConEd also suggests unplugging appliances like computers and TVs when you aren’t using them, because the International Energy Agency estimates they still use power responsible for 1 percent of the world’s carbon monoxide emissions, even if they’re turned off. And one last nag: Keep those air conditioners at 72 degrees—or turn them off and open a window. You’ll save money and emit less CO2.

What to do: Eat green

What you get out of it: Eating green produce is healthier (less travel time equals fewer lost nutrients), and supporting local farmers means fewer trucks come into the city. There are 44 Greenmarket locations in New York. For a schedule and locations, visit cenyc.org, and for an interview with the Greenmarket founder, see “The Hot Seat.”

What the environment gets out of it: See above. There are also a number of Community Supported Agriculture (CSA) programs in the city, which boost local farms that deliver fresh produce to people who buy shares in the farmer’s harvest. For more information, visit www.justfood.org. Or join a neighborhood co-op like the one in Park Slope (782 Union St between Sixth and Seventh Aves, 718-622-0560).—Lisa Murphy

Your Live Impact score 193

If you live in a Brooklyn one-bedroom, switched to ConEd Solutions, never drive, take the bus and subway, fly rarely, recycle and buy local, your score would be 193 and your annual carbon output three tons.