Slate Plus
54 W 21st St between Fifth and Sixth Aves (212-989-0096, slate-ny.com)
Sort of an upscale version of Fat Cat, Slate Plus is another fine option for the casual pong enthusiast. The paddles are a bit worn, a favorable condition for the player who relies less on finesse and ball spin than crushing overhand winners. Located in the basement, its six tables sit alongside a variety of other gaming platforms. Be warned that Slate often hosts private parties at night. Daily 11am–5pm, $14 (two people per hour); Mon–Wed 5pm–close, $15; Thu–Sun 5pm–close, $17.

Southpaw
125 Fifth Ave between Douglas St and Sterling Pl, Park Slope, Brooklyn (718-230-0236, spssounds.com) This Park Slope watering hole only has one table, but it’s a good one. The staff rolls it out on Wednesday nights for an entertaining bout of neighborhood competition. It is free to play, so long as you’re actively purchasing drinks. The wait is usually only about 20 minutes. Daily 8pm–4am Free!

LEARN FROM THE BEST

Wang Chen’s Table Tennis Club
250 W 100th St between Broadway and West End Ave (212-864-7253, wangchenttc.com Formerly the No. 4 ranked player in the world, Wang Chen is better at table tennis than you could ever hope to be—much better. Evidence of this hard truth is displayed in a case by the front desk that houses her many awards and a picture of Wang with Keanu Reeves—who looks pretty sullen, probably because he just got his ass handed to him by a tiny smirking Asian woman. The three tables upstairs are generally only used by members and stronger players; the four downstairs are open to everyone. Mon–Fri 3–10pm, Sat 10am–10pm, Sun 10am–9pm $8 per person per hour, $75 monthly membership.

New York Table Tennis Foundation
384 Broadway between Walker and White Sts (646-772-2922, nyttf.com)
If you harbored any doubts as to how seriously some people regard table tennis, stop by this spacious basement club in Chinatown—picture the secret army training scene in Enter the Dragon, but with paddles instead of swords. While they cater to more serious players, beginners are also welcome. The nine tables are in fairly constant use, but it usually doesn’t take long to get on one (most games are played to 11). Head instructor Robert Chen gives lessons at a weekend workshop, Sat and Sun from 11am–2pm ($20). Mon–Thu 1–10:30pm, Fri 1–11pm, Sat 11am–11pm, Sun 11am–6:30pm $9 per person per hour, $75 monthly membership.

New York International Table Tennis Center
134-32 35th Ave, Flushing, Queens (718-961-4208, nyittc.com)
Three-time Chinese table-tennis champion Yu Xiang Li presides over this state-of-the-art pong-nasium in Flushing. Its ten butterfly tables are also home court for Yan Jun Gao, currently the seventh-ranked player in the United States. And like the NYTTF in Chinatown, the NYITTC is open to novices and recreational players. Mon–Thu 3–11pm, Fri 3pm–midnight, Sat noon–midnight, Sun 11am–10pm $6–$7 per person per hour; shoes and paddle rental, $1 each; $65–$299 monthly membership.

Brooklyn Table Tennis Club
1100 Coney Island Ave, Coney Island, Brooklyn (718-421-2200, bttclub.com)
Contrary to popular opinion, Coney Island is not just the home of circus freaks and competitive hot-dog eaters. No, it’s also the oceanside locale of some of the city’s most earnest players—who swarm all nine tables. This is no-frills, hard-core pong at its best. Mon–Fri 2–11pm, Sat 10am–5pm, Sun 10am–2pm $5–$6 per person per hour, $65 monthly membership.

Think you’re good enough to test your skills against the best players in New York? Well, first you have to look the part. Once you figure out what style suits your game, order the corresponding blade at butterflyonline.com. Choose from the standard Shakehand or inverted Penfold, depending on your taste; beginner recreational paddles run from $16 to $60. For those rich dandies with too much time and floor space on their hands, pick up your own table at joolausa.com ($600–$1,500); plebs like us should opt for minitables ($160). Once confident that you won’t embarrass yourself, join other New York table-tennis enthusiasts on Tuesday nights at Naked Ping Pong (487 Greenwich St between Canal and Spring Sts, nakedpingpong.com, $20 to attend, plus $10 to play). While you don’t actually have to play naked inside the huge Tribeca loft, this hip, weekly party serves enough booze to make it a possibility.