The veg of reason

Despite the ability of Gotham restaurateurs to dream up every possible dining concept (mac and cheese restos, dessert bars, Automats), the advancement of vegetarian restaurants has been slow. The polarized options, ranging from holier-than-thou joints to round-the-clock deep fryers, have forced the no-meat set into a dining ghetto. All it would take to get herbivores and carnivores to break bread together—and like doing it—is this collective epiphany from New York’s omnivorous kitchens: “We need veggie options. Real ones. Now.” (And that doesn’t mean pasta primavera, people.) Until that happens, consider the flesh-free dining scene limited to these choices:

Junky

Deep-fried popcorn shrimp. A BLT with extra B. A chili cheeseburger, the meaty bits oozing through the bun. As a vegetarian, these things make me sick. As a former carnivore, they make me hungry. Thankfully, junk food doesn’t solely belong to the animal killers. Both Red Bamboo outposts (140 W 4th St between Sixth Ave and MacDougal St, 212-260-1212. 271 Adelphi St at DeKalb Ave, Fort Greene, Brooklyn; 718-643-4352) cook up Super Bowl–worthy foods, like the BBQ steak hero and Philly cheese steak, in a Zen environment. Less slick—and even tastier—is Sacred Chow (227 Sullivan St between Bleecker and W 3rd Sts, 212-337-0863), a laid-back joint whose specials often include something mock, such as one recent gut bomb, a seitan pepper-steak. The best of this bunch allows me to feel mainstream again, like the jolly guy in a Domino’s Meat Lovers commercial. One day, maybe that guy and I can hang together, farting, laughing and happily being ourselves.—JS

Crunchy

It’s the carnivore’s worst nightmare and the herbivore’s most familiar friend—eateries like Souen, Village Natural, take your pick—where chalkboards announce the greens, grains and beans of the day, and where the house-made carrot dressing outshines the ascetic ambience. These are the places of shellacked wood, potted plants, iffy lighting and impromptu folk-music jams. It’s where wines are to be tolerated, not savored, where brewed chicory replaces coffee, and where the clientele is just this side of fanatical. Modern twists on the scene, à la Angelica Kitchen (300 E 12th St between First and Second Aves, 212-228-2909) and Candle Cafe (1307 Third Ave between 74th and 75th Sts, 212-472-0970), deserve points for complex specials and flickering votives, though the framework remains the same. The earthy-crunchy place’s best food bets—steamed veggies, scrambled tofu, zippy salads—are fresh basics that you could easily whip up at home, but just don’t want to.—BG

Trendy

The dawn of a new veggie day has come, thanks to pioneers like Counter (105 First Ave between 6th and 7th Sts, 212-982-5870), with its biodynamic-wine list, raw eatery Pure Food and Wine (54 Irving Pl between 17th and 18th Sts, 212-477-1010) and cozy Chelsea date spot Blossom (187 Ninth Ave between 21st and 22nd Sts, 212-627-1144), all of which finally understand that diners who care about animal welfare have plenty of, shall we say, more practical concerns as well. For example: How flattering is the lighting? Can I get that martini extra dirty? This troika gets it, and serves tasty, creative fare to boot. (We can’t get enough of Counter’s cauliflower risotto and Blossom’s phyllo roulade, with lentils and root vegetables.) The high-gloss places aren’t without their faults, though. Some get so carried away with the scene that they’ve left the requisite tofu and tempeh off their menu. Still, we’re glad to have them—and so are the wary, meat-eating friends we drag along.—BG

Asian

It’s not hard to find vegetarian options at an Asian restaurant. It is hard to find vegetarian options that haven’t been seared in the same wok as General Tso’s. (My unspoken fear: What meat has my food touched back there?) Somewhere between chain veg joints like Zen Palate (zenpalate.com) and traditional ones such as Vegetarian Dim Sum House (24 Pell St at Doyers St, 212-577-7176) exist our favorites. Gobo (401 Sixth Ave between Waverly Pl and W 8th St, 212-255-3242; 1426 Third Ave between 80th and 81st Sts, 212-288-4686) has an eye toward protein and hearty dishes, like the king oyster mushrooms in basil black-bean sauce, that don’t leave you hungry two hours later. But even with Indian (like kosher veg spot Pongal) and Korean (elegant meat-free Hangawi) to choose from, I always end up at Vegetarian’s Paradise 2 (144 W 4th St between Sixth Ave and MacDougal St, 212-260-7130) for the city’s best Chinese mango “chicken,” fake or otherwise.—JS