Multiples
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Monica Duffy
Sun, Feb 24, at 09:44am
Everyone's situation is different! I have 5 year old healthy happy triplets and had a phenomenal career that I loved. It was a difficult decision to retire when Ian, Elena, and Sean turned 2 1/2.....I was also the bread winner. My husband and I flexed it out....we only had help when I was not working from home ..... Life is a daily marathon that I love 98% of the time. We just live differently now by choice. Been taking them everywhere alone since day 1. It would kill me to have a Nanny. It pains me to do menial housework, but it's part of the job!
I thinkstress depends on how many children you have, special needs, what kind of career you have, what kind of partner you have, how happy you are..... when the money runs out we'll see....by the way I never lived paycheck to paycheck...when I made 300K a year ...I invested and lived. I've afforded myself to stay home. I've done both...staying at home is more challenging(when you love business) and there's no paycheck for proof of your ability. The proof is in the pudding....they are delicious and not spoiled.
If everyone would stop living above their means....life would be less stressful.....the american culture is so caught up. Guess I'm just comfortable in my own skin.
Karen
Fri, Feb 22, at 12:08pm
Working parents are of a completely different mindset. We not only have to get ourselves ready every day, we have to have a complete support system for our children. We don't waste time because we don't have it to waste. Once at work we are engaged in a myriad of other ways. We still have to organize parties, conferences, recitals, lessons, care and food just like stay at home parents along with 100 other things. I'm not knocking stay at home parents, kids clearly benefit from more time with Mom and Dad. But as for stress, I'm sorry - working parents get the gold star hands down. Sure it must be stressful to feel patronized by your working spouse, not having your own funds because you don't work so have to rely on said spouse to give you your allowance and let's not forget the pressure of dressing to fit in with the other mommies on the playground - no, no way. I hate the way this question is posed though to divide and well to divide. SAHM and WMs need each other and should be supportive of the other's choices. To be able to stay at home is a gift, view it as such and try to have compassion for moms who wish they could but can't afford to. WM's have to not look down on SAHM for being out of the career, wardrobe and conversation loop. We are all doing the best we can with our choices and should try to help each other instead of seeing other women as rivals. This is the female sickness so pervasive in our society that is far more responsible for any glass ceilings than any men have imposed on us. Find a successful woman and you'll find many more behind her wanting to bring her down for her boldness. Case in point - Martha Stewart - Hilary Rodham Clinton.
I have to say that a lot of these questions were so bogus and based on the assumption that all respondents had unlimited budgets and space. Last time I looked all families in NYC were not living in a classic 6 with a live in maid. We often make choices based on what our individual families can handle. What's really exhausting? keeping up with Jones attitudes that perpetuate by questions like these!