Beyoncé and Jay Z might be touring together: These are our four dream summer-concert mash-ups
With rumors swirling that Bey and Jay might be teaming up for the Mr. and Mrs. Carter Show World Tour (head explodes, dies happy), we started to think: What other NYC combos would totally rock our faces off?
Fri Apr 18 2014
Photograph: Brian Rasic/REX USA
Ad Rock, Mike D and Santigold
While no one could ever possibly replace MCA, it's sad to think that the Beasties will never again play together. Santi—who guested on the trio's "Don't Play No Game That I Can't Win"—has the New York roots and hip-hop cred to blend with the boys. And while she lacks MCA's gravelly voice, she's got her own signature style and a hypnotic energy that could make for an exhilarating show.
Dream venue: Brooklyn Bridge Park, right near Adam Yauch Park
J. Lo and Puffy
Now that he's ditched the P. and the Diddy, why not get the band back together? It's been ages since we've thought about that time when Jenny from the block and Puff Daddy were a thing, and now that we have, we miss them! Time for J. Lo to bring back LOX and get back to basics. We can't wait to see her busting out her old Fly Girl moves while Puffy delivers spoken-word versions of his Macy's commercials. (JK, he'd be rapping, obviously.)
Dream venue: The Bronx's Paradise Theater
Kanye West and Marnie Michaels
Call it the Cringe Tour: 2014. Who could forget Marnie's so-terrible-it-was-good (actually, it was just terrible) rendition of Ye's "Stronger" in the second season of Girls? (We actually felt bad for her—and we never feel bad for her.) Who better, then, to pair up with her than the king of self-aggrandizing delusion himself, Mr. Kim Kardashian? Watching two raging narcissists battle it out on the stage would really be something to see. (And they'd obviously bring both Justin Vernon and Desi up to the mike for some chiller ballads. Think an acoustic version of "Monster.")
Dream venue: Park Avenue Armory. Nothing but the most majestic locale will do for these two (and their egos).
Cyndi Lauper and Madonna
These two broads have been rocking out since we were babes in diapers (and probably before lots of you were born) and show no signs of stopping. Cyndi's most recently rocked it as the Tony Award–winning composer of Kinky Boots, and Madge has been busy doing lots of stuff involving Kabbalah and boy toys, and taking Lourdes to school at La Guardia. The opportunity to see these gals duet and swap hits (Cyndi writhes around to "Like a Virgin," Madonna belts out "True Colors"—probably while strapped to a giant cross, because why not) is something we absolutely need in our lives. Also? Awesome sponsorship opportunities await: Activia and Boniva would no doubt want in on the action. (Just joking, ladies. We love you and wilt in the shadow of your greatness!)
Dream venue: Café Carlyle, where all the city's grand dames reside
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Editor: Marley Lynch (@marleyasinbob)