Your 1 thing for today: Monday, Nov 27



Add +

How was traveling on the second or maybe third most crowded travel day of the year, you ask? Well, I'll tell you: It sucked donkey balls. Big giant sacfuls of equine meat. Now I suspect some people may have a problem with my description, since my language, while bracing, is not pretty, but to them I say my flight truly was not unlike being faced with the business end of a donkey, which is to say the ass end of an ass. Also, I was sitting next to a man whose seat could not contain him, and I'm not talking about his boisterous energy.

But press flesh with this stranger I did, because nothing could keep me from this moment we are sharing right now, you and me, my precious blog readers—this occasion of our being reunited. You, with your eyes full and a bit moist. Me, every bit as ravishing and luminous as you remember and yet retaining a little water. And so it is unto you that I deliver this very special 1 thing, which I wrapped in swaddling, tissue paper, two sheets of bubble wrap, a whole crapload of Styrofoam peanuts and a goodly portion of newspaper before shoving into a quart-size Ziploc back and then into my suitcase for the duration of the aforementioned jaunt.

Tonight you will be headed to the Lincoln Center for the holiday tree-lighting bonanza, which is not its actual name but should be. There will be performances by the New York City Ballet, the Jazz at Lincoln Center Orchestra, the Big Apple Circus and much, much more. But how much more, you ask, because you are inquisitive? Following the whole shebang is another whole shebang: "Winter's Eve at Lincoln Square." That's a whole lot of shebang!

Users say