Alterna--Valentine's Day

Think outside the chocolate box this V-Day by giving Snookums an experience that won't be soon forgotten.

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Pottery class
This exclusive package throws you and the sugarpants into a two-hour class with a handful of other noobs at Supermud Pottery Studio (2744 Broadway between 105th and 106th Sts, second floor). “It’s a very sensual thing, massaging the clay,” says instructor Diana Warwin. “Just think of the movie Ghost.” Y’all can glaze your own sculpture (most peeps make bowls) and drop by later to pick up the fired project. 866-973-7436, xperiencedays.com; $76

Ninja lesson
Buy Babycakes a 90-minute training sesh with a Bujinkan instructor and she’ll never have to say “Not tonight—I’m tired” again. Attendees wear all black, and the sensei will determine if and when they’re ready to use weapons (swords and staffs, but—sorry, Napoleon—no nunchucks). 866-525-6839, cloud9living.com; $180

Chamber Magic at the Waldorf
Once your cocktail-attired bods are seated in the fancy-pants parlor, host Steve Cohen—who has performed for such filthy-rich New Yorkers as Michael Bloomberg, Martha Stewart and Woody Allen—will baffle you with sleight-of-hand tricks and psychic gags; dude even makes a brick disappear! Hurry up, though—the Millionaire Magician’s shows always sell out. 866-973-7436, xperiencedays.com; $140

Classic Convertible Tour
See the West Village, Soho, Chinatown and other primo nabes from behind the hood of a cherry-red 1975 Chevrolet Caprice Classic convertible. The jaunt is hosted by New York Fun Tours (which also offers Jeep excursions), and you can hop in and out as much as you like. Just remember to tip your driver, Isaac—he’s awesome. 866-525-6839, cloud9living.com; $280

AN Original Song
Music man Jordon Rothstein recently penned a song for John Legend—and now he’ll do it for your sweetie. You’ll fill out a questionnaire and confab with Rothstein to write an original number; it can be a pop ballad, a classical work, whatever. You’re welcome to take the mike or Rothstein can do the crooning, and songs are recorded in his home studio or in a rented space. “I worked with Jordon for a couple of weeks to put together a song for my wife,” says Stephen Mugford, 42. “On recording day, I took my wife and daughters into the studio, and she watched us all sing the tune, while he played the piano. He even put it on a CD for us!” 866-525-6839, cloud9living.com; $2,500

Pool lesson
Is your honey sick of feeling like a guppy in a billiard hall full of pool sharks? Union Square’s Amsterdam Billiards will match players of all skill levels with pro pool boy Chris Lynch for a one-hour master lesson. 877-839-2483, excitations.com; $210

DJ lesson
Hip, hop and they just don’t stop: Send your boyfriend/girlfriend to Scratch DJ Academy, founded by the late Run-D.M.C.’s Jam Master Jay, to learn how to beat juggle, blend, mix and more from instructors like GrandWizzard Theodore, the inventor of both the needle drop and scratch techniques, and Beverly Bond, a former model and award-winning member of the Heavy Hitter DJ Collective. 866-525-6839, cloud9living.com; $245




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