Paul Blart: Mall Cop

Kevin James, last seen opposite Adam Sandler in the gay-for-pay trainwreck of ‘I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry’, ups the quality quotient ever-so-slightly for this flour-and-water kiddie comedy where he plays the corpulent dimwit of the title, a widowed security officer (he’s never called a ‘mall cop’) for a shopping centre in California’s Orange County.

When a gang of tattooed, gun-toting le parkour experts lay siege to his mall, he’s put through a ‘Dawn of the Dead’ type set-up for which he sheds his bumbling idiot schtick and takes them out one by one. First thing to say is that this is only for the very young or easily pleased, with much of the humour deriving from James rolling about on the floor or crashing into the scenery on his Segway. Unmemorable, unfunny and unoriginal, this was a hit in the US, so brace yourself for the further adventures of Paul Blart in the not-too-distant future.