1. Without trying, you will end up learning the words to “Shipping Up to Boston,” “Dirty Water,” and “Sweet Caroline.”
2. You will eat a lot of so-so Italian food in the North End until someone clues you in to the real gems.
3. Your landlord will ask you to renew your one-year lease…one month after you have moved in.
4. You will recoil when someone says the word “packie” before learning it’s slang for “package store.”
5. You will start following Only in Boston and BostonTweet on Twitter.
6. You will learn who to call when your windshield’s busted. (1-800-54-GIANT!)
7. You will head out to a Saturday night dinner in the Seaport District and then vow never to return.
8. You will be sad to realize that happy hour basically doesn't exist here.
9. You will furnish your apartment during Allston Christmas, when thousands of students move in, and discarded freebies are found on every corner.
10. You will go to Market Basket to stock-up on cheap groceries and household goods.
11. You will drink your body weight in Dunkin' coffee.
12. You will walk a mile in sub-freezing temperatures when one of the T lines goes down.
13. You will go to Quincy Market—once.
14. You will nearly get taken out by a backpack-wearer on the T.
15. You will become fussy about your Guinness pours.
16. You will develop a healthy fear of the squirrels on the Boston Common.
17. You will buy a lawn chair in December just to use it as a space saver.
18. You will go to buy beer for the football game at 11:15am and then lolly-gag for 45 minutes while you wait for the liquor section to open.
19. You will write a Yelp review about the 66 bus, or another route that earns your scorn.
20. You will eat your first whole belly clam and then promptly call your parents to condemn the fried clam strips they fed you as a child.
21. You will spend your first weeks in town assuming a “triple decker” is some sort of sandwich.
22. You will get cut off by someone taking a right turn from the left lane who then will give you the finger as he (you know it'll be a he) passes.
23. You will develop lobster roll loyalties.
24. You will never love/hate the city more than on St. Patrick’s Day.
25. You will begin scoffing at any snowfall totals less than six inches
26. …but you will still pray for a snow day the moment the first flake appears.
27. You will take a $20 cab ride to get a $12 pizza at Santarpio’s or Regina’s.
28. You will learn to despise bike riders when you’re a driver and drivers when you’re a bike rider.
29. You will drink an iced coffee in February.
30. You will stop pronouncing it “Wor-sest-er.”
31. You will have a movie date at Jordan’s Furniture or lunch date at Ikea.