1/11If you have an ass-liver, you�re president of the fraternity. 2/11I�d rather be clam slapped than wiener whacked. 3/11�My name is Gregor.� �I am Gregor, too!� 4/11I carry a personal ChapStick and a guest ChapStick, in case anyone asks. 5/11When I get into a cab and they have paper towels, I get nervous. I have a puke fear. It�s a problem. 6/11�I�ve never been anywhere in the Caribbean.� �I�ve never been anywhere.� 8/11Remember how I was going to write that cover letter? Well, now I�m looking at Moroccan poufs on Overstock.com. 9/11I bet you homed in on my birthing hips. 10/11Her dildo�s name is Jesus. 11/11I must get a breath of fresh air. I�m being choked by your corpulence.