The East Coast Earthquake Tweets


Joking about natural disasters isn't cool when suffering abounds, but a rare seismic event on the media-dense East Coast that doesn't seem to be too serious? That's okay. In fact, it's comedy gold.

Today's earthquake, centered between Charlottesville and Richmond, Virginia, is actually part of a pattern of small earthquakes observed in Central Virginia since 1774. And while damage appears to be slight, we have heard that the National Cathedral has suffered damage and are waiting on reports from a nuclear plant near the quakes epicenter. But in the meantime, ladies and gents, as a former Virginian and lover of geologically-inspired humor, I bring you a smattering of the best East Coast Earthquake tweets of 2011:

Rob Huebel 
East Coast earthquake OR...Arby's guerrilla marketing campaign for it's new 'Ball-bustin' Shakes'?

fo_to Dan Snyder caused the 8/23/2011 east coast earthquake. #DCQuake #Snyderlibel

KaseyAnderson
FOX News reporting 5.8 East Coast quake is "What you get for electing a black president."

chunklet Chunklet 
Wait, Pitchfork is rating natural disasters now? Then how do you explain......ah, forget it.

taradublinrocks Tara Dublin 
Somewhere, Kurt Russell is pulling out his old Snake Pliskin costume. #EastCoastEarthquake

djtrend DJ TREND 
That was not an earthquake that was the Dow dropping another 500 points and the after shock.

TheOnion
Sources refuse to rule out #500footbinladen as cause of recent tremors. Story developing. #earthquake

johnedugan John Dugan 
God has heard the Dave Matthews Band and he's angry.

CDotFullStop Chad Hammond 
OH SHIT I DIE! Chris Brown tweeted "Please pray for Virginia" and someone RTd him sayin "Oh God. What did you do to her??" HAHAHAHA

dansinker dansinker 
Colorado's standing over in a corner being like, "YOU KNOW WE HAD AN EARTHQUAKE TODAY TOO."

80miles A.D. Miles 
These hilarious quake tweets ought to be called "laughter shocks!"

jonwurster Jon Wurster 
Before we jump to conclusions, are we sure that wasn't just Hulk running?

Still coming to grips with the fact that my first impulse upon feeling the earthquake was to run into the street and play air funk bass.

dorsalstream
The slight tremors in NYC did not rip open the earth and free the CHUD. Everyone please resume knish eating. #earthquake

curlycomedy 
Luckily I was holding a bag of chicken cutlets filled with breadcrumbs.

daamoth 
Aren't animals supposed to do pre-earthquake tricks like run around on their hind legs & smoke cigarettes? My dog did NOTHING.

Karl Frisch
Which right-wing religious nut will be first to blame #dcquake on DC marriage equality? Robertson? Gallager? #earthquake

[Si]dragon
What I love about the Internet: it took us less time to learn the magnitude than to exit the building. #earthquake

Benjy Bronk
I bet some kid just jerked off for the first time & thinks he caused it #earthquake

Scott Karp
The earthquake jokes are as epic as the earthquake itself. #earthquake

BrianYarvual OK, pipe down D.C., the New Yorkers have to discuss their earthquake moments and surviving "the Big One."

And from Facebook...

 

The bass on this track I'm working on is SHAKING THE WHOLE ROOM! My mixing skillz are getting better & better 11!!11!!1!1

 

Tell me when it's OK to stop looting.

Bam. I just survived the Reston quake of 2011 in the bathroom. Classy

Got a favorite earthquake tweet, drop it in the comments, please.

 


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