The Kidnapping of the President

Oh yeah. Verily. For it is he of Starship Enterprise (Shatner). He cometh and walketh with the American Prez in the valley of the shadow of death (a pedestrian mall in Toronto). He faceth up to the Cubans and Weathermen and psychos and he saith unto them: 'Fuck off. For we shall fear nothing. Especially not you creeps and Commies'. And they reply: 'Look upon us. We are Moloch and Satan. We come creeping forth as vermin on our bellies , the legacy of Chile and El Salvador and American imperialism. We take your Prez and hold him in our chariot (a booby-trapped armoured car), using implements of destruction from Hawaii Five-O, Mission Impossible and other halls of TV fame.' But Captain Kirk turns upon the Commies and Cubans and Weathermen, and his voice is as thunder, saying: 'Lo. I did once (in the '70s, in fact) what you do now, and I did it well. But I look upon you and ask, is it good? It is not good'. And there is a great flashing of lightning (TNT), a beating of brows and rattling of bones, and the Prez walks on, free, down the American Way with his wife on his right hand and Kirk on his left. For although we walk through the valley of crap...