Today in WTF news: Chipotle has big-name authors writing pieces for their cups and bags

I’ll take one burrito with a side of Toni Morrison, please!

MFA students and aspiring writers everywhere, stop penning those heartfelt submission letters to The New Yorker and Granta: Your newest aspirational publication is…Chipotle?!
Es verdad: Authors including Malcolm Gladwell, Jonathan Safran Foer and Toni Morrison are participating in the Cultivating Thought series, penning original work to be placed on the Mexican-food superchain’s cups and bags—the idea being that diners who’ve forgotten a book, e-reader or iPhone (or myriad other sources of diversion most subwaygoers carry everywhere) will have something to read while chowing down on a burrito bowl. (Bill Hader is one of the contributors, and we’re holding out hope for a Stefon-inspired recommendation on the best places in the city to enjoy one’s Chipotle, say, in the spacious backyard of a dwarf who makes his living as a human bowling pin.)
Here’s what we hope to read as we stuff chips and guac into our faceholes:
The Bluest Corn Tortilla, by Toni Morrison: the story of a girl named Picante, who uses blue corn for her tortillas when everyone around her uses yellow.
Eating Animals (and Beans and Rice and Guac and Tacos), by Jonathan Safran Foer: an in-depth look at the conditions that go into creating your meal. (We recommend reading only after you’ve finished eating.)
The Farting Point, by Malcolm Gladwell: how little beans can make all the difference.
Leeks and Cheeks, by Judd Apatow: Freaks and Geeks retold through the eyes of Chipotle’s newest taco ingredients, leeks and cheeks (pork, beef, what have you). The leeks are the cool kids, the cheeks the nerds (natch), but they all end up friends. Aww.
Salsa Is Magic, by Sarah Silverman: a free-form riff that involves, inevitably, a story involving Sarah putting extra-spicy salsa on her boyfriend’s bad parts and having to go to the emergency room.