On TV tonight: It's Coooooonan O'Briiiiiiiien

Mitchell Haaseth/NBC
Mitchell Haaseth/NBC

TONIGHT: The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien (11:35pm on NBC)

Let's all pity Conan O'Brien. He's left New York City, the only city in the world where a talk show host could be a pale Irish version of the Jolly Green Giant performing gonzo acts of comedy about masturbation. He has been shipped off to Los Angeles, where he'll burn like bacon in the unrelenting sunlight, take over the wheezing behemoth that once was Johnny Carson's legacy and still have to follow the bland Jay Leno every night anyway.

What's that? O'Brien is getting millions of dollars to make small talk with celebrities and spit out a topical five-minute monologue every night? Never mind. We'll watch O'Brien—without the pity—on his debut tonight. Or, you know, there's always Letterman.

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