Your 1 Thing for Today: Monday, Jan 22

Not a spit bubble

The new catchphrase around the office seems to be "And that's why you're single!" Sometimes people add their own spin to it by substituting So for And, or even just leaving the first word off entirely. I should add that by new catchphrase I mean thing which people think it's hilarious to say to me, exclusively, which strangely leaves me speechless, which is weird since if you know me you know that I AM NEVER SPEECHLESS. [Go for it, say it here.]

Anyway, with this in mind I am hesitant to brag about my ability to blow spit bubbles off the end of my tongue with my own saliva, but the thing is, it's phenomenal. I mean, I can raise my eyebrows one at a time. I can play Skee-ball. I have a word-for-word memory for conversations when I'm not drunk. I can spot a nose job a mile off. But the spit bubble thing, while arguably disgusting, is truly special.

Not nearly as special as the giant bubbles Fan Yang blows in his unbubblelievable (this is not my own word, btw) show, The Gazillion Bubble Show. The man does things with bubbles which have never been done before. He holds Guinness book records for bubble blowing and it pains me to say I'm not making that up. Seriously. Go for the bubbles, stay for the bubbles. Also, go for the fact that you may be the tallest person there since it's sort of for kids but you have height issues anyway.