Your 1 Thing for Today: Monday, Mar 12

No crayons

[The following is a long sentence and an overshare all wrapped into one. It's an overlongshare. Enjoy!]

Remember that year that we went to the Big Apple Barbecue and then I had to use the bathroom (unrelated) and the closest one I could find was at one of the fast-food restaurants across the way, but the line was so long that I went instead to a nearby bar and then I lost my nerve for some reason since I wasn't a customer, so I went back to where you were waiting at the fast-food place but then the line hadn't budged so I went back to the bar and used the bathroom and then came back and you were all steamed because it had been an eight-year-old holding the bathroom line up the whole time and then I broke up with you because I decided you were kind of a maniac and what would happen if one day we had an eight-year-old and he needed to take his sweet time in the bathroom because he accidentally ate crayons or something?

That wasn't fun at all! Hopefully it won't be on my mind at the Spring Forward: Get Grilling! event today at Madison Square park from 7am to 7pm. Free demos and tastings and everything!