Check out these 57 wonderful things opening in New York City in July

The month is chock-full of cool theater shows, fireworks, long-anticipated movie premieres and plenty more

Ah, July. The seventh month of the year is named after Julius Caesar (really!), and is generally the most summer-iest of months…in the Northern Hemisphere, anyway. For New Yorkers, this means that there's a lot of outside activities and things to do, so to whet your appetites and appease your palates we've collected some of the coolest things to do. Wear sunscreen!


July 1
Free movie trivia; Videology

Brush up on your Nicolas Cage quotes at this free movie-themed game night fit for movie lovers to the nerdiest of cinephiles. But watch out for "the beeeeeeees!!!"

July 1
I’m New HereCan You Show Me Around?; Union Hall
Author Jon Ronson combines forces with Maeve Higgins to talk about their "moving to NYC" stories. Special guests are promised, as is the ability to laugh at the plight of other people as they spend six months thinking "Gowanus" is pronounced "go anus."

July 2  
Brooklyn Cyclones Wacky Wednesday: Zombie Night; MCU Park
Peanuts. Cracker Jack. Zombies. What could be more American, we ask you? Paula Deen in a bikini shooting a rifle while singing "The Star-Spangled Banner"? Possibly. Baseball sounds way more fun, though.

July 3

SummerStage:The Freedom Dance Party; Central Park
Celebrate 11 years of infectious beats and groovy dance moves at the longest-running, free, nighttime dance party in NYC.

July 4
Macy’s Fireworks Spectacular 
The one with the fireworks on the East River. Does it need an explanation? Wait, our editor is telling us that it does. Okay. Well, there'll be a lot of bangs and poofs and whiffs and oohing and aahing. Much like our memories of high school, but we digress. Oh yeah, it's a $6 million fireworks show and it's free and it's one of the best firework shows of the year, freshly moved back to the East River after years on the Hudson. Suck it, Jersey!

July 9
2014 Brooklyn Hip-Hop Festival; various locations
If you've ever jammed out to dope artists like De La Soul, Jay Z or A Tribe Called Quest, than you get why Brooklyn's the best place for this festival. Also, we need to stop using vernacular from 1993. 

July 10
The Muppet Vault: Sci-Fi; Union Hall
After a night out drinking, most everyone in Park Slope already looks like a Muppet. Come and see the real deal at this rare Muppet review, featuring some of Jim Henson's lesser-known creations.
July 13
Bastille Day; Smith St, Cobble Hill, Brooklyn
Hey, Amélie—quit being so whimsical and je ne sais quois about life and get your derriere to Smith Street for this daylong street festival. Paris in Brooklyn? Baguettaboudit.

July 15
Sunset Salsa; Hudson River Park
Salsa dancing is energetic, fun and sensual, which are also three words that we here at Time Out New York use to pepper our online dating profiles. And what could be more ooh la la than learning how to execute an exotic dance move at sunset?
July 17
Sharknado; Brooklyn Bridge Park
Let's just say if you played a drinking game that involved taking a shot every time you spotted a supersized shark flailing it's gigantic, fishy body onto a vehicle, you'd end this movie pretty wasted.
July 20
The Fourth Annual Knights of Brüklyn Home Brew Competition; The Bell House
It's not just Brooklyn, it's Brüklyn, so obviously this will be a much cooler and much more delicious night. And since it's Brüklyn beer, it's that fine stuff. None of that PBR nonsense.

July 26
The Filthy Gorgeous Talent Show; Coney Island
Who knew you could be grossly disgusting and dramatically beautiful at the same time? Don't take our word for it. The name says it all. See for yourself.
July 29
Trivworks Presents: Pat Kiernan’s Trivia Food Fight; The Bell House
You've seen this local legend (by way of Canada) on your TV; now see him live and in person at this food-themed trivia show.


July 4
Life Itself
Roger Ebert was a champ, but before he was a champ he was just another struggling journalist trying to make a living while being creative and weird. You'll probably see half the Time Out New York office at any given screening, weeping silently into back issues of our own magazine. Seriously; the guy was a legend. Seeing just how he became a legend is the interesting part.

July 11
No, not Boyz in the Hood, Boyhood. The one where Richard Linklater followed a ten-year-old boy for seven years. Not in a creepy way: in a filmmaking way.

July 11
Land Ho
One comma in the middle could have made this a lot more offensive of a title. Just saying.

July 18
A Master Builder
This is what we at Time Out New York call ourselves after we make anything from Ikea.

July 25
Scarlett Johannson is a woman with superhuman strength and mindpower. She also plays one in this movie that promises to be a female-forward action blockbuster. Count us in!


July 4
98th Nathan's Famous International Hot Dog Eating Contest; Nathan's Famous 
Reigning champion Joey Chestnut will attempt to cram 70 hot dogs into his gaping maw in public while children stare in wonder and bemusement as to how they, too, can combine eating with fame.

July 8–14
French Restaurant Week; various locations
French cuisine is a lot more than frog legs and catty waiters. It's quite FRANCly delicious. See what we did there? Franc? Hey, these captions can't all be home runs.

July 19
The Total Greenpoint Immersion; various locations

Is this Greenpoint immersion the one where you buy a $7 latte from a guy with a liberal-arts degree in performance art? Probably not. But it will show you some of the best and brightest highlights of this bustling neighborhood. 

July 21–Aug 15
NYC Restaurant Week; various locations
So many restaurants, so little time! Actually there's tons of time to check out these restaurants. It goes on until August. So we didn't even need to write that last sentence. But we can't seem to find the backspace key. Oh well.

July 26
Bacon and Beer Classic; Citi Field
Good times often include beer and/or bacon. And here you don't even have to choose. Crazy! What are you even gonna do with all this great news? Eat ridiculous amounts of delicious bacon and drink tons of beer, that's what. Duh.


July 8–16
Rosas/Anne Teresa De Keersmaeker; Gerard W. Lynch Theater (at John Jay College)
Belgium-based Anna Teresa De Keersmaeker revisits four earlier iconic works.

July 1527
Bolshoi Ballet; David H. Koch Theater (at Lincoln Center)
You've heard the name: Bolshoi is only gonna be here for six days to perform Swan Lake. This is sort of like the Beatles showing up to play their greatest hits. Get on this. 
July 15–Aug 10
Pilobolus at Joyce Theater
Pronounced "pillow bus," these guys and gals are quirky dancers. Kinda like us after six vodka sodas. Only good.

July 24
A Batalha do Passinho + Rennie Harris Puremovement; Damrosch Park at Lincoln Center
Puremovement is one word, as is buyaticket, which you should do.

July 25

Pam Tanowitz Dance; Damrosch Park at Lincoln Center
Our mom used to have a friend named Pam Tanowitz. This isn't her, thankfully. The famous dance troupe will be led by a string quartet.


July 7–12
Kaidan Chibusa No Enoki (The Ghost Tale of the Wet Nurse Tree); Rose Theater
Despite a name that sounds like an unwritten Morrissey song, The Ghost Tale of the Wet Nurse Tree actually is going to be the best way for New Yorkers to witness classic Japanese Kabuki theater without hopping on a plane to Tokyo.

July 8
Fuerza Bruta: Wayra; Daryl Roth Theatre
Fuerza Bruta originated in Buenos Aires and have been touring with their surreal theatrics since 2005.

July 13
The Long Shrift: James Franco directs this Off Broadway play at the Rattlestick Playwrights Theater
Theater. Did he have to? No. But he did anyway.

July 22
King Lear
John Lithgow does Shakespeare's tragedy in Central Park at the Delacorte Theater.

July 30 
Sex with Strangers
A new play that features Anna Gunn from Breaking Bad at the Second Stage Theatre. Points if you bring your own blue meth.


July 9
Sky Ferreira; Music Hall of Williamsburg
The "Everything Is Embarrassing" singer hopefully won't embarrass herself too much at this show. We kid. She's pretty awesome.
July 11, 12
On the Run Tour: Beyoncé and Jay Z; MetLife 

Beyonce was all, "girls run the world" and Jay Z was like, "Nah, I run this town" so the powerful R&B and hip-hop moguls decided to team up in this tour that will to continue their plan to take over the world.

July 16–18
Flume; Terminal 5
Are we running out of band names? Yes. But this shouldn't stop you from seeing these indie rockers do their thing.

July 22
Juicy J; Terminal 5
It should be noted that Jaz Joyner, the associate editor of this section, exclaimed "YAAAAASSSS" upon reading about this event. So take her lead and go see Juicy J do his thing.

July 30

Ingrid Michaelson; SummerStage
Ingrid loves you just the Way You Are. But she'll probably love you more if you come to her show.


July 9
Catherine Lacey: Nobody Is Ever Missing; BookCourt
Lacey launches her phenomenal debut novel, about a woman who trades in her life and marriage for a one-way ticket to New Zealand.

July 16
Debut novelists Mira Jacob, Courtney Muam, Ted Thompson and Tiphanie Yanique; Bryant Park Reading Room
Four first-time novelists share writing advice and what they learned through the publishing process.

July 21
Joanna Rakoff and Emma Straub
the powerHouse Arena
The authors of two of 2014's best books come together to read from My Salinger Year and The Vacationers against the backdrop of the Manhattan skyline.

July 23
Edan Lepucki: California; McNally Jackson
Colbert's new favorite writer, Edan Lepucki, celebrates the release of California, her post-apocalyptic literary novel.

July 26, 27
The Fourth Annual New York City Poetry Festival; Governors Island
The city's only all-poetry festival returns to Governors Island with two days of readings by over 250 poets.


July 3
Joan Rivers; Laurie Beechman Theater
Joan is one of the best comedians out there, and has been doing this a lot longer than everyone else. To miss this would be fools wisdom of the highest order.

July 9

Judah Friedlander's "World Champion Wednesday," a 75-minute comedy show; The Stand
He of the "funny hat and glasses" from 30 Rock will be performing bios semiregular revue, most likely with new hats, too. If that's your thing.

July 10–12
SNL Weekend Update anchor Colin Jost; Carolines on Broadway
A guy from Saturday Night Live will appear live onstage on a Thursday night. Can you handle that? Hilarity will ensue, as will former Time Out New York cover star Colin Jost.

July 11–13
Trevor Noah; Gotham Comedy Club
It's only the South African comic's second time performing in NYC, but you can bet he's still going to kill this room. Er, not literally.

July 15
Sisters of Comedy stand-up show; Gotham Comedy Club
This monthly showcase features entirely women of color (and really funny jokes.)


July 4
Hot Rabbit Three-Year Anniversary; Monster Bar
Hot Rabbits, folks. Get 'em while they're hot. This long-running LGBT night celebrates its three-year anniversary with a blowout party that is going to put the last two years to shame. Onwards and upwards!

July 5–Aug 2
HOT! Festival; Dixon Place
This festival will be HOT!, in all caps, with an exclamation point, so you know damn well it's gonna be a good party. Get your groove on with your pants on (or off), as seems appropriate.

July 12
Staten Island Pride takes place at Staten Island LGBT Community Center.

July 16
Erin Markey: It's a Girl; Joe's Pub
Diva power wrapped in a guise of what we've previously called fantastically weird. She's known to sing about leotards, hurricanes and Bible-belt Christians, so you know, the good stuff.

July 19
Bronx Pride; various locations

Pride Month continues to live up to its name by continuing well into the month.


July 5
Flea Market Betty; 87 & 90 Havemeyer St, Brooklyn
Can fleas have markets? While you ponder that, go to the flea market named "Betty" and peruse the items.

July 9
'90s Fashion Inspiration Through Film: Clueless, Summer on the Hudson: Pier, Picture Show; Riverside Park
"What the hell is that?" "A dress." "Says who?" "Calvin Klein."

July 17
H&M is opening its biggest U.S. store on Fifth Ave at 48th St
H&M can be bigger? Yes, it's possible. And it's happening! We, for one, welcome our new H&M overlords.

Band of Outsiders; Soho
They might be a Band of Outsiders, but lucky for them, they get to stay indoors from now on, with a new location where you can, like, buy stuff. Actual, cool, fashionable stuff.