Straight dope

Crown Heights will see its first-ever Straight Pride Parade this weekend. So how do the homos feel?

Reggae artists on the Taking Care Of Our Own Productions ( label are planning a Straight Pride Parade for Sunday 31 at 10am, starting at Church and Flatbush Avenues in Crown Heights and continuing down Bob Marley Avenue. It was organized in response to accusations made by gay activists, specifically Peter Tatchell, founder of the activist group OutRage!, that certain reggae songs, including Stapler’s “Hit Them Hard,” incite violence against gays. “The issue is not homophobia,” explains Tatchell. “It is incitement to murder gay people, which is a criminal offense.”

Gregory Larson, president of TCOOO Productions, views the parade and song quite differently, calling it “pro-family, not anti-gay.” Adds Larson, “It just talks about a man and his wife, but the gay community takes it as a hit against them. Maybe because they can’t have children, I don’t know.”

To help mediate, we asked local pop star Jonny “Gay Pimp” McGovern (of Keep It Faggity: The Gay Pimp Remix Project and This is NYC, Bitch! The East Village Remix fame; to rewrite the lyrics of “Hit Them Hard” in response to the parade.


“Hit Them Hard”By Stapler

Jah Jah gonna hit them hard All the men who visit men backyard Leaving all the women to starve…

Hand in hand with my lady Hug her and kiss her ’cause she carried my baby But some boys moving shady While I’m chilling on the ends making sweet love to Sadie…

Remember you are a king, what happened to your queen The youths need a role model to instill self-esteem So live your life clean and you will see what I mean…

Children live what they learn Aren’t you concerned of your choices in society We need to preserve the value of a male and a female in every family