No Name Italian Restaurant (CLOSED)

There ain’t nothing fancy about No Name but that’s just how the regulars like it. Take the stairs via the seedy back alley entrance and you’ll find yourself ejected into a starkly lit dining room packed tight with chipped Laminex tables. The standard menu hasn’t changed in decades, chalked up on a blackboard by the kitchen. Specials are scrawled in messy handwriting at the bottom. For the most part it’s rustic Italian, and by rustic we mean kick ass servings a growing teenage boy would struggle to get through, slapped onto original 1970s Corningware. Sure, the bolognese sauce on the mountain of spaghetti is a little on the greasy side but a good sprinkling of parmesan and an extra wedge of butter will make it that much better. The schnitzel comes in veal or chicken and is deep fried to a heart-clogging shade of dark brown. Get one or two pieces, and if you're really hungry, add a side of spaghetti and make it a combo. Free baskets of soft and fresh Italian bread and bowls of crisp iceberg lettuce with dressing are the sweetener here. The big tub of red cordial on the counter is free and unlimited for customers too. Mangia!