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Clubbed (2009)

Director: Neil Thompson

Time Out rating

Average user rating

26 reviews

Movie review

From Time Out London

It’s the 1980s, and Danny (Mel Raido) is the gormless poet warrior-turned-headbutt-happy club doorman who narrates this tawdry tale of how he got tough in an unnamed northern hinterland. One minute he’s getting his head stomped on by cockney boot-boys while his kids watch in dismay, then, via a swift montage of him leafing through Sun Tzu’s ‘The Art of War’ and practising his haymaker in the mirror, he’s graduated to the Zen power-trip world of the regional bouncer and started duffing up all and sundry.

It’s a comically inept and unfocused piece of filmmaking, with ‘This Is England’-lite period detail attained by what looks like a bring-your-own-costume policy (plastic replica pork-pie hats anyone?), numerous side characters who have no relation to the plot whatsoever (including Neil Morrissey in a boilersuit and cravat) and an overwritten, ‘artsy’ voiceover (à la Guy Ritchie) that sounds like it was recorded in one take. Shaun Parkes’s charismatic turn as virtuous fellow bouncer Rob is the film’s sole redeeming feature.

Author: David Jenkins

Time Out London Issue 2004, 15-21 Jan, 2009

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User reviews of this film

shiva preetam said...

Posted on Jun 02 2011 07:11 The movie is good. The performances of the actors, the background score, the well crafted script, the direction, the locations......everythning is very good.

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Caitlin said...

Posted on May 19 2010 02:14 "I really get the feeling that someone will now post a message appearing to undermine this review of what is a very poor film."
Fear not. I'm on your side. I'm as dumbfounded as you are. I'm currently writing on this film as part of a thesis project, and am absolutely astounded at the fact that so many people enjoyed it. Not only is it terribly written and horribly produced, but it's also offensive. It condones self-improvement through violence and reeks of misogyny. At least we can comfort ourselves in the fact that the critics have panned it.

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Fictional Reviews said...

Posted on May 12 2010 09:46 I just don't believe the reviews on this film. I get the feeling that perhaps some interested parties might be trying to boost the reviews of this terrible movie. Surely a few people must think its only worth 3 stars? If this film is a bonified 5 star classic wouldn't it be better known? I really get the feeling that someone will now post a message appearing to undermine this review of what is a very poor film. As far as this being a classic, well come on. Let's see what happens?

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steve said...

Posted on May 12 2010 08:00 Enjoyed this film thouroghly and at the end of the day ,thats what its all about in my humble opinion!

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C Smith said...

Posted on Mar 20 2010 22:11 Never mind the proud brummy in the first review. The rest of working class britain was no better at the time. A disturbing film in parts that reflects the worst of society at the time. A number of themes are lossely stringed together to create a violent,warming film that will leave you shaken.

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Matt said...

Posted on Mar 15 2010 17:15 An awful film that does nothing to shed light on life in the Midlands. Loads of rubbish Ska references without a decent ska soundtrack. The voice over grates at every turn spelling out what's happening on screen, mainly because the script is so dire. As a Coventry resident I think that its fair to say that this film is nothing like a Midlands club night and I've never been to a boxing gym with only 3 people in it. Why have a Northern Soul sound track. Misguided & funded with your money this film betrays all that is good about the Midlands and the 2nd wave of Ska. Shame on you.

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Jay said...

Posted on Mar 03 2010 15:17 Great Low Budget Film......9/10

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Andy said...

Posted on Sep 24 2009 17:03 This film is fantastic, see it at all costs, miss it at your peril.

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Davey B said...

Posted on May 02 2009 17:10 This film is a class act. I saw it in the cinema and have just ordered the DVD (go to amazon, it's only £6.99 there).
Don't miss it, it's set to be a classic!

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terry said...

Posted on May 02 2009 16:27 just watched this film and thought it was great really enjoyed it 10 out of 10 anyone who watches it should think the same or they have no idea of what a good film is top banana

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Andrew said...

Posted on Apr 29 2009 04:08 A stonker of a film. You must see it, pure entertainment from start to finish. Pay no attention to what the critics write.

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Adrian said...

Posted on Mar 20 2009 14:59 I watched the film and loved it, It's strange that when the luvvie critics slate a film Joe Bloggs on the street tend to love it? I loved it from start to finnsh.

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Ross Brown said...

Posted on Mar 20 2009 02:04 Very enjoyable film!! This critic doesnt have a clue what he's talking about and I feel that I am a tough one to please. Go and see it for yourself!

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Stevie G said...

Posted on Mar 01 2009 21:34 Great film! Was gripped from start to finish. Great performances, a stunning soundtrack and visually pleasing.
I would urge people to disregard the featured review (if you can even call it that), as this 'critic' clearly has a very strange perception of what is good and bad, in film. Who employed this person to review movies? Shocking.

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Warner said...

Posted on Jan 29 2009 14:32 A Great film, Great soundtrack, Great story, and some Great messages in there to.... The last reviewer has got it wrong, a handfull !!, Mr T.. has written 35 books so far, and i would hope many more, have a look at some of his new stuff, the guy is prolific....FULL MARKS from me.

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