The Mirror Crack'd

Though it's obvious after five minutes that this is a complete no-no, the cinema equivalent of a bellyflop, it exercises a perverse fascination. You couldn't ask for a weirder exercise in whimsical English fantasy than a Miss Marple mystery masquerading as a Royal Command Performance in which all the American stars look stoned. Hingeing on death threats sent to the star (HRH Liz Taylor) of a visiting US movie, we are plunged into a timeless zone of the Home Counties, village lawns and pickled English character players where murders occur as inexplicably and as regularly as teatime. The main highlight is not the cheating plot but the rollcall of puffy, under-rehearsed stars: Hudson and Taylor as a neurotic couple in search of their cue cards, Tony Curtis stealing scenes as a bug-like movie producer, while a pink-clad, souped-up Kim Novak reappears as the legendary Kim Novak. The overall effect is of a holographed Madame Tussaud's. DMacp.