Taste test: new pumpkin, candy corn and other fall-flavored foods

1/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

UV Vodka Salty Caramel Apple

Smells like hot apple cider, tastes like apple cough syrup with a really gross, thick mouth feel. Just incredibly nasty.

2/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Starburst Fruit-Flavored Candy Corn

Like eating a chalk candle made of Kool-Aid powder. Horrid.

3/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Caramel Apple Oreos

The attempt at capturing the tart green apple flavor in cream form fails miserably. So artificial and sweet our teeth hurt.

4/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Yoplait Light Pumpkin Pie Yogurt

There's a heinous aftertaste of fake sugar. And nothing remotely pumpkiny.

5/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Mother's Pumpkin Spice Cream Liqueur

There's a reason this is called "Mother's": Only the 60-plus female set would touch this saccharine stuff. But, we will allow that it could possibly give coffee a nice zing.

6/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Trader Joe's Pumpkin Greek Yogurt

This has no pumpkin flavor. It just tastes like sweet yogurt.

7/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Yoplait Apple Crisp Yogurt

Yuck! It tastes like Christmas. But, like, sad Christmas.

8/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Pumpkin Spice Hershey's Kisses

Waxy, like tasting a pumpkin spice candle.

9/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Nature's Path Pumpkin-N-Spice Chewy Granola Bars

Sticky and only faintly pumpkiny, this is like something you would put in a hamster cage. If you wanted your hamster to go into a diabetic coma.

10/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

White Chocolate Candy Corn M&Ms

Not bad, but it's a strange taste, like there's frosting in there instead of chocolate.

 

Pumpkin Spice M&Ms

Much better than the candy corn ones, but there's no pumpkin flavor and they also smell like cinnamon candy. But at least there's actual chocolate.

 

11/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Herr's Pumpkin-Shaped Candy Corn Flavor-Coated Pretzels

There's nothing candy corn-like about these—they just taste like white chocolate–covered pretzels. Which is not a horrible thing.

12/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Philadelphia Pumpkin Spice Cream Cheese

This is like regular cream cheese with brown sugar blended into it. And frosting.

13/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Candy Corn Oreos

Smells—and tastes—like store-bought icing in a can. Fairly inoffensive.

14/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Pumpkin Spice Coffee-Mate

Doesn't really have a pumpkin taste, but somehow the flavor is definitely fall-like. And this creamer add better flavor than flavored coffee.

15/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Jones Caramel Apple Soda

Pretty accurate caramel-apple taste. But do you really want a liquified caramel apple?

 

Jones Candy Corn Soda

It smells like IRN-BRU. And that makes us feel like being drunk in Scotland.

16/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Eggo Seasons Pumpkin Spice

A clear gingerbread taste. They're nice and spicy and would be even better with butter.

17/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Market Pantry Pumpkin Cheesecake Creme Sandwich Cookies

Very sweet, but with a nice hint of salt, too.

 

18/22

Extra Pumpkin Spice gum

It has a strange, cardboard-like texture—it's just too weird to be chewing pumpkins.

Extra Apple Crisp gum

It has a pleasant, spot-on apple taste. We'd probably chew this again.

19/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Little Debbie Pumpkin Delights

This tastes like the same cake used for Little Debbie Oatmeal Cream Pies (which are the bomb), only with a hint of spice.

20/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Edy's Pumpkin Patch Ice Cream

Starbucks lovers, take note: This tastes just like a frozen pumpkin spice latte.

 

21/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Pumpkin Pie Pop-Tarts

These are shockingly good, most likely because there's real pumpkin inside, which is more than we can say about anything else we tried.

22/22
Photograph: Martha Williams

Thomas' Pumpkin Spice Bagels - WINNER

Creamy bits of pumpkin are embedded all over this bagel, which, when toasted, becomes gooey and addictive. We will be fighting over these in the office.

Okay, we get it. You love pumpkin spice lattes from Starbucks. We can get behind sipping them on occasion, but we're not sure we can get behind the "Pumpkin Spice Latte Effect," in which every food you can imagine is doctored up with pumpkin or other fall flavors. This year we started seeing really ridiculous things. Candy corn M&Ms. Candy apple soda. Pumpkin spice Hershey's Kisses. 

We hit Target, Walgreens and other stores to find as many seasonal pumpkin, apple and candy corn–inspired items as possible and tried them all in one sugary binge. Here's what we tried, arranged in order from worst to best.

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