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[title]This week, the great-grandmother of all things erotic, Dr. Ruth Westheimer, descends upon the Museum of Jewish Heritage (36 Battery Pl at 1st Pl; 646-437-4200, mjhnyc.org; Wed 9 at 7pm, $10--$15) to answer New Yorkers’ most blushworthy questions. Just don’t try turning the tables on the good doc—her nasty-doin’ is none of your damn business.
The Museum of Jewish Heritage, eh?
I’m a trustee, I’m on their board, and I think it’s a very important museum. Especially in my case, coming out of Nazi Germany, having been an orphan at the age of ten.... I’m doing this lecture for free. On my 80th birthday, we did a big celebration and raised $80,000 for the museum, too. And we danced a lot.
What questions still perplex you?
I’ll tell you one thing: We don’t know the reasons for homosexuality and heterosexuality. We really need some new studies to give us answers on those issues.
Do you have any crazy stories from over the years?
I only have stories! In the Jewish tradition, they say, “A lesson taught with humor is a lesson retained.” I can tell you some funny ones...like the girl who likes tossing onion rings on her boyfriend’s erect penis.
Do you support one-night stands?
I believe in people having partners and staying with partners. I’m worried that in New York City, now that we have sex clubs springing up, we are going to see more sexually transmitted diseases. Young people think that there’s nothing to worry about, because they haven’t seen any AIDS patients. And even though I talk about orgasms and erections, I’m old-fashioned and square; I believe you should find yourself a significant other and have a good relationship and some terrific-good sex.
How terrific-good is your own sex life?
I don’t answer any personal questions, and I don’t ask any personal questions. Put that down.—David Yi