Jaws 3-D

Just when you thought it was safe (yet again) to go back into the cinema, a new Jaws hits the screen, this time in 3-D (you need some form of gimmick to sell a film with little or no storyline). A new 'Undersea Kingdom', fashioned out of a lagoon at Sea World, Florida, is about to be opened to the public. Everything goes according to plan until...dum-da-dum...enter Great White through a damaged sea gate, and the usual havoc begins. Quaid is the constructor of this giant aquarium, Armstrong the girl obsessed with dolphins and other sea creatures; of course neither of them realises anything is afoot until people start disappearing and end up as bits and pieces floating out towards the cinema audience. A right royal turkey.