Pirates of the Caribbean: Salazar's Revenge

Film, Action and adventure
2 out of 5 stars
2 out of 5 stars
(7user reviews)
Pirates of the Caribbean: Salazar's Revenge

Captain Jack Sparrow is back – again – in yet another unthrilling episode of the swashbuckling adventure franchise

Despite cries to abandon ship, ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ has set sail yet again. We’re on film five now and this really is swashbuckling by numbers, with prison altercations, ghost crews, hangman’s high jinks and battle scenes that could have been lifted from earlier movies. But ‘Dead Men’ is clearly an attempt to return to the good old days of the franchise, with an actual plot – however wishy-washy – and two new young things, played by Kaya Scodelario and Brenton Thwaites. 

Scodelario is Carina, a ‘woman of science’, a self-taught astronomer hunted on land as a witch. She’s smart and strong, but the movie is too distracted by its own kookiness for her to really get interesting. Thwaites is Henry, the bland but honourable offspring of the even blander Will and Elizabeth – Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley’s characters in the earlier films. Bloom even makes a brief, breathless appearance, his cheeks covered in cockles, but fans hoping for a meaningful reunion with Knightley will be left hanging. 

Carina and Henry are on the hunt for Poseidon’s Trident, a mythical weapon that, if uncovered, has the power to break every oceanic curse – and therefore undo the plots of the movies that came before. Geoffrey Rush’s Captain Barbosa ends up being the most likeable character here; Javier Bardem’s pirate-hunter Salazar is all raspy one-dimensional revenge and let’s not even talk about that Paul McCartney cameo.

Unfortunately for everyone, Captain Jack Sparrow is still slurring and staggering around the Caribbean. Whatever charm and charisma Johnny Depp once had in this role is well and truly lost at sea. Even flashbacks to his youth – the origin story no one asked for, complete with CGI fresh-faced-ness – fail to reignite the love affair we once had with this hard-living pirate. Fourteen years after ‘The Curse of the Black Pearl’, he’s drunker, stupider and more of a lech. The jokes about women run aground, and watching him perve over Carina in her undergarments is repulsive rather than amusing. Avast, already!

By: Ellie Walker-Arnott

Posted:

Release details

Rated:
12A
Release date:
Friday May 26 2017
Duration:
129 mins

Cast and crew

Director:
Joachim Rønning, Espen Sandberg
Screenwriter:
Jeff Nathanson
Cast:
Johnny Depp
Kaya Scodelario
Orlando Bloom
Geoffrey Rush
Javier Bardem

Average User Rating

1.7 / 5

Rating Breakdown

  • 5 star:0
  • 4 star:0
  • 3 star:1
  • 2 star:2
  • 1 star:3
LiveReviews|7
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Tastemaker

The latest movie in this franchise really confirms that beyond the ride and the first movie, there isn't much leg room in Jack Sparrow's adventures. Johnny Depp once again slurs his way through this movie which has a couple of good set pieces but ultimately fails to make much sense as Javier Bardem looks for vengeance. Kids will love it (although a drunk pirate for a hero is a bit of an odd pairing) but for some reason the whole thing just seems forced, staged and disconnected. Time to put this one in Davey Jones's Locker for good methinks.

tastemaker

Oh boy.... Honestly. I deserve this. I deserve the disappointment. I should've known better than to go there AGAIN with these storylines. They've clearly lost the plot with this particular franchise.

I was so confused throughout the whole movie. Why was the Spanish dead pirate so vengeful? It made no particular sense... So many questions ... Plus there was a lot of overacting in this movie for me. It turned into somewhat of a pantomime which is never a good thing.

Honestly they should've called it quits on film 2 or 4 .... This was muddled and annoying... Very melodramatic yet uninspiring.. The 1 star is for the special effects which was the highlight of the movie for me sadly.

tastemaker

Captain Jack Sparrow returns to the big screen in the next instalment of the Pirates franchise, but with less sparkle and originality. It’s like watching a has-been rock star, past his prime, still trying to milk what made him famous in the first place. Some key previous cast returning alongside Johnny Depp including Geoffrey Rush and for a fleeting moment Keira Knightly and Orlando Bloom. The inclusion of Knightly and Bloom at the end doesn’t do the film any favours, its casts this latest love story between Brenton Thwaites and Kaya Scodelario as weak by comparison. There are moments when this film captivates slightly, for example the opening set piece and hearing the score we’ve come to love, but otherwise you can’t help but watch this film and think that it hasn’t been able to recapture it’s past lustre. 

tastemaker

I haven’t watched a Pirates movie for years and this was a good reminder why. Threadbare plot, too much CGI, ridiculous comedy set pieces and a lead character that has now gone way beyond parody - it’s hard to keep track of exactly what is going on and more importantly ‘why’.

Johnny Depp really looks like he can’t be that bothered anymore and is just going through the motions for one more payday.

The two young leads give it a good go and Geoffrey Rush brings a natural level of gravitas to his role but frankly it’s still too little to rescue the overlong and clunky movie.

Tastemaker

It is what it is. I saw it at the imax in 3D, it seemed made for 3D. Jack Sparrow is getting a bit old and it could have used some new life.

tastemaker

We've strayed way to far from the original aim of Pirates of the Caribbean back in the Curse of the Black Pearl days. Those were the days though!


What this franchise seemed to set out to do in the beginning is to bring us a truly classic, all swords and ships-type pirate film, and it truly did, with flying colours. Then slowly it decided that we needed a deeper, darker storyline. Let's get politics involved. Let's get more baddies. More ships. More islands. More beards... and then finally, this.


Salazar's Revenge is nothing more than an assembly of literally everything from the past (how many again?) films - every joke, every line, every costume, every character has been used before. The two new, young characters are basically Knightley and Bloom from the earlier films, and are so utterly cheesy and uninteresting that even their mere appearance on screen makes you cringe. Barbosa is loveable but at this point just a shadow of his original self and yes, Jack Sparrow has now become more perverse and creepy than funny and cheeky. The new baddies are basically under the same curse that Barbosa's crew was in the very first film - and even Javier Bardem and his admittedly pretty cool cgi look can't make me care about them. 


For Bloom and Knightley to have cameos in this film was necessary, I guess, but those appearances, again, fail to do entirely what they should. Bloom doesn't even pretend that he's interested in being in this film - I can't describe just how much he doesn't even make an attempt to be in character. It's easier for Knightley - she doesn't have to say anything.


The whole plot is predictable, and you already know what each character is about to say at every second, even though you sincerely hope that maybe this time you're wrong. You're not. This is the type of lazy storytelling that makes you think of just how much money has been wasted uselessly instead of helping cure cancer or stop climate change.


This is probably the laziest, most worthless film yet in the franchise and I'm very worried that the last couple of lines hinted at yet another sequel. For the sake of anything that PotC has achieved in the (very distant) past, I really hope I'm wrong.

tastemaker

Well this was a bit a wasted evening... I will admit that I am not a massive fan of this franchise; although I did like the first film... the visual effects in the second film were astonishing and I did appreciate some of the effects in this film too but it as lacking too much. The truly bizarre appearing of Kiera Knightly (who thankfully said NOTHING) was the icing on the cake.


Although did anyone notice the opening sequence was a direct rip off Fast & Furious 6, where they steal a rather large safe which they drag behind multiple cars, as they drive through the city! That's exactly what happens here... just replace the city with an island town and the cars with horses.... maybe a tribute?