Bad Blood

Study the following plot synopsis: strapping young thing Ted finds that his mummy isn't his real mother, that in fact he was stolen from his real mother by his real father, who then had his brains blown out by his real mother's real father. Got that? Good. Now when Ted goes to visit his real mom with his real wife, things start to get complicated, because mommy thinks her son is actually her deceased husband, thus making her her own son's wife. Problems arise from the fact that Ted already has a real wife (in the form of the magnificent Linda Blair), so mom has to stiff her daughter-in-law in order to become her own daughter-in-law, so that she can have sex with her dead husband. Now answer the following questions: 1) How much of a bad time did the movie's writer probably have during potty training? 2) How long will it be before the above plot is reproduced in either Neighbours or Dallas? 3) How can you explain sitting through this to your friends?