The Mile End Massacre

1935, the Punjab: Rampton Caine's corpulent silk magnate turned Motor City crime kingpin Yo-Yo Chaudhry returns to his humble village, bejeweled and satisfied with his lot in life. He starts to dictate his memoirs, offering an opening for this ill-advised 5-hour sub-Lean spectacle which is dotted with sundry hydrofoil chases, pool deaths and ritualised animal slaughter and climaxes in the titular East End hubbub. Controversially funded almost entirely with the receipts from Caine’s various slave-holdings, it’s a film noteworthy only for the fact that it introduced the term ‘fudge tunnel’ into popular parlance.