If you’ve never actually been to North Norfolk, then this corner of the UK might ring a certain bell marked ‘Alan Partridge’. If that’s the case, rest assured that The Harper is a far cry from the Linton Travel Tavern.
Let’s get it out of the way up front: this place is posh. How posh? ‘Owned by the husband of Prince Harry’s ex-girlfriend Chelsy Davy’ posh. You might expect that to come with some baggage: standoffish staff, ‘keep off the furniture’ vibes. But I’d like to reassure you that this is absolutely not the case. Every single person in a Harper uniform, from reception to the restaurant, was lovely, laidback, welcoming and up for a chat – especially when it came to tips on the local area. (And as for ‘keep off the furniture’, the hotel puts visible efforts into making itself welcoming to the most disruptive customers around: children and dogs.)
On arrival, you may be surprised to see how imposing The Harper is for somewhere that credibly describes itself ‘boutique’. The hotel takes up a significant chunk of the small village of Langham, a five-minute drive from the seal-spotted marshes of the Norfolk coast. (And it’s set to get bigger still, with a planned expansion into the manor house next door.)
A hulking, red-roofed, flint-covered horseshoe, The Harper is built around a converted barn (formerly a glassblowing factory) with wings out back housing 30-ish rooms and a spa. In the middle is a cute and cosy courtyard scattered with outdoor tables, festoon lights and woodburners.
The upstairs rooms are the ones to book if you can, with views out over cottages and farmland. The furniture and fittings are first-rate, with a general vibe of ‘warm neutral’ and flashes of country house, cottagecore and midcentury-modern.
Massive beds (mattresses: firm; sheets: very soft) join forces with the rural quiet to induce an excellent night’s kip. There’s no traffic noise, just church bells and squawking pheasants – plus the very occasional supersonic roar, whenever the local RAF base are testing their new toys.
Breakfast, lunch and dinner are in the Stanley’s restaurant. It’s residents-only, and its bare brick walls are dotted with pop art. Breakfast is especially strong, specialising in English twists on the classics – crumpet-based eggs royale or benedict; earl grey prune compote and marmalade granola. They go heavy on local produce here: don’t skip the smoked salmon from nearby Brancaster Staithe. The full english, in veggie or carnivore versions, is worth it just for the best-in-show hash brown.
From lunch till late, there’s a set menu for the true gourmands – but we stuck to the seasonal à la carte, where everything was good, especially the risotto and steak.
When you’re not eating, you can hit the spa. You book a slot at reception for exclusive use of the pool, hot tub, sauna and steam room, a system which I loved: who wants to share when you can have the place to yourself? Upstairs, you can get a decently-priced facial or massage in one of the handful of treatment rooms.
Fancy some fresh air? Borrow wellies or a bike for a country walk or cycle, or hop in the car to explore the villages and stunning beaches along the coast, or the stately homes inland. And when it’s raining (not unknown around these parts) there are two excellent rooms to hang out in: a lofty upstairs lounge called Ivy’s with board games, massive coffee-table books and a wine dispenser (sadly out of service for our visit, but due to return soon), and a downstairs bar with a fireplace and pool table.
This doesn’t often happen at a hotel, but it genuinely feels like they’ve thought of everything here. The only tiny thing we could find to gripe about was the bizarrely slow lift. Take the stairs if you’re able.
All this comes at a cost, of course – this will very much not be your cheapest ever weekend away. But The Harper doesn’t feel grasping: on the contrary, there’s a tangible spirit of generosity here, extending to free home-baked treats and bottled cocktails in the rooms. And one more nice touch: everything at breakfast is included in the room rates – so you can feel like you’ve got your money’s worth at the buffet without reaching for Alan’s Big Plate.
Neighbourhood
There’s not much else to do in Langham itself, though the staff will happily recommend local walking routes. The Harper also owns the village pub, the Blue Bell. It has a lovely beer garden with a climbing frame for kids, and serves moderately jazzed-up pub grub at lower prices than Stanley’s: £20 rather than £30 or £40 for a main course.
Nearby
Stiffkey: for a country walk, lunch at the Stiffkey Red Lion, and tea, cake and present-shopping at surprisingly trendy village shop Stiffkey Stores.
Cley-next-the-Sea: for sea swims, birdwatching, and pints or a pub lunch at the George and Dragon.
Wells-next-the-Sea: for fish and chips on the quayside, penny arcade games and a gorgeous sandy beach.
Time Out tip
Bring your furry friend! The Harper is particularly dog-friendly. Pooches are welcome almost everywhere – the exception is Stanley’s, but you can still order from the restaurant menu and sit in the lounge just outside. There’s a dog bath outside (with shampoo and towels) to use after muddy walks, free dog biscuits at reception, and comfy-looking dog beds available in the rooms.
