Drunken Review: getting sloppy at Sputnik Bar

Written by
Noa Bonné
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Noa Bonné heads to Sputnik for a night of drinking, dancing and...s'mores?

The Foggy Effect:

We started the night at my dear friend Itai's house, who lives near Sputnik Bar. I brought a bottle of Campari, which we downed like beasts. It was time to leave, but I wasn't drunk enough, so I sought guidance from a bottle of old reliable: Tuby (my 'get real drunk real fast' go-to).

Music:

On Wednesdays, it’s all about the Hip Hop at Sputnik – from Beyonce and Drake to Schoolboy Q and Flying Lotus. What does this entail? Dancing, dancing, dancing.

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Lying Around:

As the drunk girl who likes to get fucked up while sitting on the closest thing I can find to a chair – and yelling 'woohoo!' every now and then to remind the world I'm alive – I was happy to discover a ton of tables and chairs near the dance floor.  Also, in the smaller space called the 'Living Room', you can find sofas and couches – so if you're the drunken nap type, you're all set.

Service:

The service was one of the most tolerant I've ever witnessed. Then again, I was pretty content in my chair. Although we smashed three plates and five shot glasses, Itai spilled a beer all over my outfit and I had to ask for a new one (the beer, not the outfit), and we danced around the bar with a mannequin from the display, the staff gave us that empathetic smile and head nod, indicating they understood our drunk situation.  

Atmosphere:

Young and Tel Avivian. The usual Sputnik crowd consists of really chill and cool folks that won’t judge you when dancing like a freak to the "Look at the Flick of the Wrist” song.

Smoking:

It’s nicer to smoke outside, especially in the Living Room.

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Puking:

The bathroom at Sputnik was surprisingly clean. There are bathrooms in all three main spaces: the Living Room, the dance floor and the patio. I highly recommend going to the bathroom at the dance floor because you have tons of space. You can puke quietly and then just sit on the floor contemplating your questionable life choices.

Munch:

Ordering s'mores and French fries seemed like a really good idea at the time...

In Conclusion:

Sputnik Bar is perfect for massive hangouts with friends. The crowd comes in big groups most of the time, so it can be quite difficult if you're single and trying to mingle. Anyways, it’s always fun being sloppy drunk at Sputnik.

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