1. 'Waze misjudged the traffic'
You can't go boasting to all of your North American friends about how much better the Israel GPS app is than their old school Google Maps app, then turn on it at the expense of your dignity. Even the world's largest community based traffic and navigation app has its days. "Stupid smart phone! I thought you were supposed to be...well...smart!"
2. 'Somebody stole my bike'
It is a rite of passage to have at least one bike stolen when living in Tel Aviv, the unofficial cycling capital of the Middle East (to be fair, there isn't much competition for the title with all the sand and what not). A few empathetic looks are expected, perhaps even a pat on the back or an uncomfortable hug...but those sympathetic sentiments will fade when the supposedly 'stolen' bike magically reappears later that day.
3. 'I blame Taglit'
There's a lot we can blame on the manmade traffic jams that start in May and last until July (sometimes August if you count the token few who extend their trip, then link arms with others of their kind and multiply to create the ultimate antagonist, or as Mario would call him, "Birthright Bowser"). But let's be honest, how much time does weaving through a pack of stray cats struggling to be herded actually add to the saga? 5 minutes? Maybe less? Just steer clear of the bright red lanyards and Jewish American Princesses and you'll be fine.
4. 'The bus never came' (or was 'too full')
Holding public transportation responsible has become "the dog ate my homework" of the 21st century. I don't want to hear it. You're an hour late and everything in Tel Aviv is a 20 minute walk away. Tops.
5. 'Everybody else is doing it'
'Israel time' is more than an Urban myth, it's a real live phenomenon. Don't believe us? Try showing up to the office before 9 o'clock or a '5 à 7' happy hour before 7:00 pm...no one will be there. Everyone in Israel is late to everything. Their excuse: "Everyone else is doing it, so it's fine." Peer pressure can be intimidating, but if everyone else jumped off Masada, would you?
By Jennifer Greenberg, who runs by the motto: "Early is on time, on time is late, and late is unacceptable."
Take a look at the top five people that ruin the beach.