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Top five "summer-is-officially-over" buzz kills

Top five "summer-is-officially-over" buzz kills

1. Glass ceilings

Have you ever read Steven King's "Under the Dome"? Or perhaps seen The Simpsons Movie? Well, those nightmares of the impending doom that comes from being trapped inside a glass bubble are finally taking form. Beware the wrath of the evil closed-in patio season, coming soon to a Tel Aviv restaurant near you!
 

2. His Dudeness

No matter how many hours you sweat it out at Bikram, that cold shower just ain't the same when the weather outside is as dank as your yoga mat. Swallow that pride and quit sticking it to the Dude–for the next couple of months, he will become your best friend (and your utility bill's worst enemy).
 

3. Mazgan be gone!

After months of fighting over the mazgan–with your coworkers, life partner(s), and alter ego–the time has come to cast those vendettas to the chilly wind. Cash in your chips (aka stolen air-conditioning remotes) in exchange for 'heated' brawls over the 30+ degree Celsius room temperature–lovely for Israeli blood, lethal for anyone else's.
 

4. Hoarding: Buried Alive

You've briefed your mom on the cramped size of your studio apartment. Heck, you've even shown her around on FaceTime once or twice, but that was before the rain washed in–along with your drying rack, extra luggage, and Dick Van Bike all of which were forced to seek shelter indoors. "Sweetheart, we've talked about your hoarding habits before," she exclaims, the concern evident in her furrowed brow.
 

5. Foot prisons

Summer in Israel: it's hot, it's bothersome, it's never-ending. But at least it gives you an excuse to wear open-toed sandals (and get fancy pants pedicures) for what feels like an eternity. You gave those feet absolute freedom to run wild among the cockroaches and broken glass, and now you're punishing them with solitary confinement? What gives? "Screw you, foot prisons!"

 

By Jennifer Greenberg, who wears flip-flops year-round.

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