You shouldn’t expect subtlety or cutting wit from a comedy named after a bowel function, but nothing prepares you for the ineptness and crassness of this ‘Twilight’ parody. The fact that the vampire teen franchise has already been cluelessly sent up in ‘Vampires Suck’ is just a minor flaw compared to the movie’s other catalogue of crimes against humour, which include gags about well-endowed Africans, cameos from randy dwarves and much sniggering at the concept of gay marriage. Craig Moss directs like a man whose idea of panache is to remember to take the lens cap off the camera when pointing it at his actors – which they, in turn, may regret in the event any of his young cast ever star in a good movie. You have to endure 70-plus minutes before witnessing its low point: sneering footage of real ‘Twilight’ fans. That’s when bad taste tips into cruelty.