Escaped cons Harry (Northam) and Wayne Wayne Wayne Jr (Zahn) hole up in Happy, Texas, after hijacking a camper van - and the locals are expecting them. That is, they're expecting a pair of homosexual beauty pageant directors to coach the town's pre-pubescent girls to the county finals. While the eminently ill-suited Wayne is stuck teaching the teenies to twirl, his much smoother partner sets about be-girlfriending the bank manager, Jo (Walker), and fending off the advances of the sheriff, Chappy Dent (Macy). The film is nothing if not easygoing, and it has its share of neat touches and good lines. Regrettably, most of them occur in the first five minutes. The rest is more slack than slick - which gives you ample time to consider the gaping holes in the plot. Zahn clucks dumb for all he's worth, but director Illsley is unaccountably more interested in Northam's bland, wistful encounters with lovelorn Texans.