Only angels have wings. They also have some pretty mad weapons training—as shown by the gun-wielding Michael (Bettany), a fallen celestial defying God’s orders to bring forth the end-times. When supernatural armies target the next Christ (about to be born in a desert diner subtly named “Paradise Falls”), Michael must rally a motley crew of humans to his protective cause. What follows often resembles a prime John Carpenter thriller—call it Assault on Manger 13—until an overcaffeinated angel-fu climax significantly lowers the intelligence quotient.—Keith Uhlich
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