Dakota Johnson proved herself an expert in outshining tarnished surroundings early, thanks to 50 Shades of Grey. But with Madame Web, her patience for sub-par material seems to be running thin.
Co-written by director SJ Clarkson, Claire Parker, and Matt Sazama and Burk Sharpless (of 2022’s ignominious Morbius), this misguided origin story – located awkwardly on the outskirts of the Spider-man universe – feels created by committee, without a central voice or confident core.
Johnson’s Cassandra is an emotionally-troubled paramedic horrified to realise she can see the future, until her friend Ben Parker (Adam Scott) reminds her that with great power comes great—well, you know. Soon she’s risking her own life to protect three equally gifted teens (Celeste O’Connor, Isabela Merced, and miscast Sydney Sweeney) targeted by a sinister spider-hunter (a stilted Tahar Rahim).
Dakota Johnson’s patience for sub-par material seems to be wearing thin
Johnson tries to evoke Cassandra’s inner turmoil, and the scenes between her and Scott offer glimpses of a more promising project. But any potential gets buried early, beneath clumsy exposition, clunky special effects, and disconnected editing. Few of the other actors, including Emma Roberts, Zosia Mamet, and Mike Epps, even make an impact.
Ultimately, everyone involved is likely to appreciate Johnson’s boldly blunt attempts to head off bad reviews by declaring her industry’s lack of imagination ‘majorly disheartening’. She’s right. Creatives rarely hold all the power in Hollywood. Should they really shoulder all the responsibility?
In cinemas worldwide Wed Feb 13.
