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New Zealand has a tater tots-crust pizza and you can’t have it

Written by
Marcia Gagliardi
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Meet the “Hash Bites Crust Pizza,” Pizza Hut New Zealand's answer to all your filthiest dreams about fried-potato-and-pizza-pie unions.

No, it doesn’t have hash in it—“hash bites” is what those Antipodeans call tater tots, and they're using it to embellish their pizza crusts. (Can someone please start a Change.org petition to bring this carb monstrosity stateside, pllllease?)

Since Pizza Hut New Zealand already offers hash tots/tater bites (whatever the hell they call them) as a side on their menu, it seems like it was just a matter of time before someone would stick them on the crust. Next level, that move. The cheeseburger crust pizza is also back on Pizza Hut NZ’s menu—quite obviously they are fearless people. (Kiwis can keep their Marmite-stuffed crust, however.)

Americans can, however, console ourselves with the new stuffed garlic knots pizza, which sounds like the late-night love child of Pizza Hut and Olive Garden.

And before you scoff at this new naughty knotty pizza, we should be clear: They are cheese-stuffed garlic knots—16 of the little guys!—which you can gluttonously peel off the crust and dunk into the extra cups of marinara sauce like no one's watching.

Because Pizza Hut obviously likes you to play with your food. 

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