1. They never quite figured out the functional purpose of that piece of cardboard underneath their pizza slice.
3. They order a pint instead of a "hayzi." And never dare order a "shlish."
4. They speak Hebrew with conviction, even when the waitress responds in English.
5. They frequent 'Misrad Haklita' (Ministry of Aliyah and Integration Offices) more than the bank...they also frequent the bank more than an office.
6. They still think Kuli Alma is "cool."
7. They misuse the term "ka-ee-lu" because they figure it can be placed anywhere in a sentence.
8. They sport one of the following:
a) Hamsa charm necklace
b) Red string
c) Hebrew tattoo
d) All of the above
9. They tip more than 10%.
10. They occasionally start a sentence with: "This one time on Birthright..."
11. They're on time for meetings (at least it's an improvement; they used to be ten minutes early).
12. They're terrified of the 'Monit Sheirut' (alternative mini-buses).
13. They still drool over men in uniform.
14. Kikar Rabin is their number one destination on any National holiday.
15. They still pronounce it "Jaffa."
16. They order "cappuccinos," don't understand the hot water and mint phenomenon, and order 'café shahor' when they really want an Americano...then proceed to drink that extremely strong coffee to hide their mistake.
17. You can find them passed out – or on the verge of passing out – on the Ayalon highway on Yom Kippur.
18. They buy plain hummus from Tiv Tam's fridge section and eat it as is.
19. They are still overwhelmed by the thought of tomatoes before noon.
20. They have not yet given up on 'agorot'...or Bibi...or his son.
21. They own an iPhone, iPad, MacBook, and a host of other apple devices.
22. They cannot pronounce the street Ibn Gvirol, no matter how hard they try.
23. They go to Teder, get a shave at Barberia, and dress the part, but unavoidably stick out like a sore thumb.
Written by a proud Olah Chadasha, 17 months and counting.
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