Summer in Boston means enjoying the warm weather, often dining alfresco with friends and family. This weekend especially, so many of us will be headed to backyard bbqs, cookouts and parties. Proper etiquette can make all the difference in getting a return invite to that friend of a friend’s rooftop in Back Bay or to your boss’ beach house, so keep reading to hear from a pro on how to be a gracious guest when attending a cookout this summer.
Daena Jeanne Antonelli is an etiquette consultant in Boston and she works with individuals, teams and organizations on how to navigate personal and professional situations with grace, confidence and cultural sensitivity. We caught up with her for her tops tips on how to be the best guest at events this summer. And if you want to learn more, Antonelli is hosting an etiquette class at Rochambeau later this summer and tickets are still available.
1) Always RSVP promptly
First, RSVPs are crucial. Whether you receive an invitation via text, email, or in the mail, responding promptly is a sign of respect. This helps the host plan the event efficiently and ensures everyone is accounted for. Even if you're unsure about attending, it's better to respond with a polite decline than to leave the host guessing.
2) Bring something to share
When attending a cookout, it's customary to contribute to the gathering. Offer to bring a dish or a thoughtful gift for the host. Consider the host's preferences, any dietary restrictions, or the theme of the gathering when choosing what to bring. If you're unsure, it’s ok to ask the host for suggestions.
3) Thank the host
Upon arrival, take a moment to acknowledge the host and thank them for their invitation. Offer a compliment on the setup or the aroma of the grill to make the host feel appreciated. The goal is to have a welcoming environment for everyone involved and a compliment here and there goes a long way.
4) Offer to help out
During the cookout, offer your assistance to the host with setting the table, arranging seating, or helping with food preparation, if appropriate. This shows that you are genuinely invested in the event's success. You want to also keep your surroundings tidy and respect the host's home or outdoor space as this showcases your consideration for others.
5) Watch what you say
Lastly, avoid controversial subjects that might make others uncomfortable. Engage in light-hearted discussions that promote inclusivity and positivity. Remember, cookouts are meant to be enjoyable where everyone feels at ease. No need to debate over the grill.